Well done...

I have a lot of incredible friends. They are women that inspire me and make me want to be a better person, a better friend and a better mom. I have had the privilege of walking beside many wonderful women while they experienced some really tough stuff. I have prayed with all of them. Cried with most and been righteously angry with some. But, it is no doubt that I have been blessed to know them all.


I have a friend who has done some intense counseling the last few years to deal with some painful issues from her past. She worked hard and kept pushing through until she found freedom. I told her that she even looks different. You can see the difference in her countenance. Well done, my friend!


I have a friend who found herself getting a divorce after 28 years of marriage. She moved out of her house and sought Godly counsel. She had worked all of her life and was able to buy a house of her own. She has opened her home for teenage foster children and unwed mothers. She has offered a safe haven for others. I called her last weekend and asked her to help another one of my friends who was in desperate need of a safe place to live. She said yes without hesitation. Well done, my friend!


I have a friend who married her best friend right after college. They were living life and raising kids. Life took a few unexpected turns and her husband turned to alcohol. She knew God was calling her to stay in the marriage. It was hard. It was long. We prayed and cried out to God for almost 4 years. She was obedient and He was faithful. She told me not long ago after a particularly good weekend that she was finally beginning to see a glimpse of her best friend again. Well done, my friend!


I have a friend who lived a really hard life. She had a daughter who was living with a girl who had a very rough set of friends. She was in her bathroom in the house when the boyfriend came in and began to attack the other girl. He shot. The bullet went through the wall and killed my friend's daughter. After lots of years and lots of prayer and lots of healing; my friend went to the prison to see the person who killed her daughter. She forgave him. She told him so. She started a grief ministry that now is in several different churches. She has a granddaughter that is named for her beloved daughter. Well done, my friend!


I have a friend that came from an abusive and hard background. She made a lot of bad choices. She turned to drugs. She met a man that wanted to love her and help her. They got married. She got help. They came to our church and heard the Word of God preached very clearly. They found Jesus. She has 6 kids. She homeschools. She has worked with a ministry that reaches out to women in the adult entertainment business. They go into clubs and love on these women. She is amazing. Well done, my friend!


I have a friend who went on the mission field as a grandmother. Her and her husband served for several years in the middle east. She came home and was looking for a way to reach the people group that she had left. She started going to an apartment ministry that our church does. She reached out to the women there and formed a ministry to teach them to sew handbags. Very nice handbags. They make them with donated material. They are beautiful. They sell them so that these women can help provide for their families. In the process, the women learn English. They learn about life in the United States and they learn about the love of Jesus. Well done, my friend!


I have a friend who was born into a Muslim family. She met Jesus in a dream. She made a decision to give her life to Him. She lives with her husband and children who do not share her views. She came to my Bible Study. She has prayed beautiful prayers over me and my family in Arabic. She loves Jesus. She loves people. She helps so many women who are struggling and she has an amazing outlook on life. Well done, my friend!


I have friends who have experienced really hard things. I have friends who have been blessed beyond measure. I know women who are incredible mothers. I know women who are pouring into their grandchildren.  I know women who are making a difference in the business world. I know women who have chosen to raise their children on the mission field. I know women who are preparing to go to another country to share their lives with others. I know women who are raising their children by themselves and doing a great job. They are all living a calling. They are making a difference. They are loving others with a Love that offers freedom. I love them all. And they love well.


That is what I want to do. Love well. To offer what I have. To help when I can and to be a friend at all times. Thank you, my friends, for setting the example.

"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! 

You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. 
Come and share your master's happiness!' 
Matthew 25:21

A Monday of Memories

Today is one of those dreary kind of days. The kind that makes you just want to sit and do nothing.  As I was sitting in my chair early this morning, I was thinking about the weekend. We had a great weekend. Celebrated a birthday. Spent some quality time with my sweet husband. Made a drive up to the North Georgia mountains and reminisced a little about our college days. As we drove through our old campus, we realized that there is not much left of the old. In fact, a large part of the campus is completely new. But the dorms I lived in and the dorm he lived in are still there. We drove around and remembered old stories and old friends. That campus holds great memories.


We went to our favorite restaurant in town. It is still the same. A little bigger now, but it still looks the same. It is the restaurant we ate in for many of our dates. We ate there the night he proposed to me. We took the girls back there years later to share the stories. It holds great memories.


We drove around the town and out to a camp where we used to go to hike and fish. We spent a lot of Saturday afternoons there just walking around, watching him fish and talking for hours. I grew up going to summer camp there so I would remember all those great camp experiences while we were making new memories. He proposed to me in front of the waterfall there. Our girls have gone to summer camp there. We have taken them back there to see the waterfall and tell the story. That camp holds great memories.


We ate some fudge. We ate some boiled peanuts. We drove around all of our old hang out places. We talked and we laughed. But most of all we remembered. All those years ago, we made memories. We love to tell some of the stories to our girls. They feel like they know a little part of our lives before they came along. 


They have always loved our stories. They know the story of our first date. We told them how daddy decided we were going to walk to the restaurant because he thought it would be romantic. We told them how a torrential down pour came and their aunt had to come pick us up and take us back to campus. We have walked down that same road with them and eaten in that same restaurant. We have shown them pictures of us back then. So many years ago.


As I thought about all of these things this morning, I was reminded of something our pastor always says. He says that one of the most important things you can do for your kids is tell them your story. Not just the stories of your childhood and of your life; but of your relationship with the Lord. Tell them how you came to faith. Tell them if you struggled or what you have learned since then. Tell them about how you have grown and what God has done in your life. He will use all of your story. Even the hard parts and the parts that weren't such good memories. He works all things together for good. Tell your children that.


Our past can become part of their future. Our stories can become stories they tell their children. My prayer is that our story of our faith and of our love for Jesus is a huge part of that legacy. That their stories will be a reflection of what we have told them and taught them. Memories hold powerful stories that reach into the generations to come.

"...so the next generation would know them,

 even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children."

Psalm 78:6

My Best Friend...

I met him when I was 18 years old. I told my friend that I was going to marry him soon after. Sometimes you just know these things. And sometimes the dream actually comes true. We dated for 3 years through college and then I married him when I was 21. He was truly my best friend, but the being married part was not that easy...


Marriage is not for the faint of heart. It takes a lot of work and a lot of prayer and a lot of sacrifice. I may have married my best friend but I was living with a partner for life. Someone who had his own thoughts and his own ways and his own opinions. Yes, we enjoyed the same things. For the most part, we were raised the same way. And as far as we knew, we wanted the same things. Then reality came along.


While we were doing our pre-marital counseling, the pastor asked us how we felt about divorce. Well, that was an interesting question for an engaged couple. He said he didn't want to know if we thought it was right or wrong. He wanted to know if it was an option. That one question was a defining moment in our future married life. He told us to talk about it. So, we did.


For us, we decided before we got married, that it was not an option. We took it off the table. Both of us. We made a conscious decision that as we did life together and worked through the ups and downs, we would be faced with a lot of choices. We would have the choice of how we handled the tough arguments and the bad days and the unforeseen issues that would come along. But that choice was not available. For us, we made a decision that day that changed our perspective for life.


God has blessed us. It has not been easy. People ask me all the time what it takes to have a strong marriage. I tell them it takes two people who are both willing to work hard, pray harder and put the other one first at all cost. It takes a willingness to put someone ahead of ourselves. To find out what God has to say about marriage and then to actually try and follow through. It takes sacrifice. It takes thick skin. It takes commitment. It takes a sense of humor. But most of all, it takes honesty.


As I am watching my daughter prepare for a marriage that will last, I am finding myself thinking a lot about my own marriage. About what advice I can give her and what bit of wisdom might be a defining question for her. The best I can come up with is God's way is best. His ways are not our ways and His thoughts are not our thoughts. They are better.


Danny and I both grew up in a Christian home. We both grew up going to church, going to youth group and reading our Bible. We knew the lingo and the actions. But, we both were missing the relationship. Mainly, because there was no one around to disciple us. To teach us. To live life on life with us so that we understood what we said we believed.


I am so thankful for the people who God placed in our lives early on to help us both gain a deeper understanding. We got married young and so we naturally spent our time around people in our same stage of life. That usually meant people who were older than us. We needed that discipleship and that life on life example. God was faithful and we knew that we wanted to model discipleship for our children. 


I believe that relationship is the key to everything. No amount of study or rules or discipline can replace relationship. It is what we were made for. To be in relationship with God and with each other. The Bible says that love covers a multitude of sin. I am so thankful that my husband loves me. But I am more thankful that he loves Jesus. That relationship is what has made our relationship so strong.


I am celebrating my best friend's birthday this weekend. I still love spending time with him. I still love the things that made me want to marry him. But, today, that love is so much stronger and deeper than I could have ever imagined all those years ago. Jesus is the reason.


Happy Birthday my sweet husband. You have blessed me and your girls beyond measure. Thank you that you love Jesus. Thank you that you love us. Thank you that you made a covenant with me all those years ago. May God richly bless you as you begin another year of your life. Thank you for allowing us to be a part of it!

Intentional Living

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life, because almost everything -- all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure -- these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important." ~ Steve Jobs


As I have read all of the articles and news stories this morning about the death of Steve Jobs, I found this quote of his to be the most interesting. What an amazing man he was. Full of knowledge and insight, but most of all full of vision. He saw the potential of things. He did not necessarily invent things. He took things he saw and turned them into their full potential. He was intentional about how he thought, about how he worked and about how he lived. And in the process, he impacted this world in a way very few people have. In a way that leaves a legacy.


We have that same opportunity. We may not be a genius or even understand technology, but we have the potential to impact the lives and the world around us. We too can leave a legacy. We have the choice every day to live that day with intention and with purpose. And if we know Jesus, we can have the knowledge and the insight. But we also know the One who has the vision. That power and vision is inside of us. We just have to tap into it.


This morning I read this in my devotion: "Be willing to follow wherever I lead. Follow Me wholeheartedly, with glad anticipation quickening your pace. Though you don't know what lies ahead, I know; and that is enough! Some of My richest blessings are just around the bend: out of sight, but nonetheless very real."


We are not promised tomorrow. But we have today and the promise that He knows what tomorrow brings. The choice is ours. Let's begin living intentionally. We can be an intentional friend. We can have an intentional prayer life. We can be an intentional parent. We can make intentional decisions that will impact our todays and bless our tomorrows.


Today, let's remember what is important. We can't control the future. Not for ourselves or for our families or for our friends. But we can control how we think and how we act. We can be intentional with our money, with our words, with our time and with our love.


Choose to look at today and count your blessings. Teach your children to count theirs too. Life is hard and full of unexpected twists and turns, but we know the One who knows how it all ends. Trust Him with that vision and walk in the way He is leading. Be intentional about it.

"I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, 

that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; 

therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live." 

Deuteronomy 30:19

A Gift

This morning I have read a facebook message about the anniversary of the death of a friend's son, talked to a friend who is in a desperate and dangerous situation with her marriage, prayed for a friend who is getting married this weekend after a long, painful season of divorce and hurt and processed a conversation from yesterday with a friend whose 3 month old nephew is in a hospital bed waiting for a bone marrow match to cure a sickness that the doctor's don't even have a solid diagnosis for.


Life is hard and tough and sad and painful sometimes. It can be overwhelming. We can find ourselves focusing on all the bad stuff. But there is Hope.


Today, let's be a gift of friendship or love or help to someone. Hug your kids, be sweet to your spouse, smile at the person in the grocery store, pray for your co-worker, help someone who looks like they may need it. Whatever God lays on your heart today, do it.


God is not restrained by time the way we are. Use your time wisely today. Don't let the hours slip away without making a difference. He will bless your effort.

"Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is." Ephesians 5:15-17.


I am praying for everyone who reads this today. My heart is breaking for some, rejoicing with others and Hopeful for so many. Consider yourself lifted to the throne room of Grace.

Love is...

There has been a Facebook posting that has been going around lately about what we should teach our daughters. It is really good. It talks about what we should teach our daughters about how a man should see them and treat them. I saw it again this morning. It says:

We need to teach our daughters the difference between

A man who FLATTERS her and a man who COMPLIMENTS her.

A man who SPENDS MONEY on her and a man who INVESTS in her.

A man who views her as PROPERTY and a man who views her PROPERLY.

A man who LUSTS after her and a man who LOVES her.

A man who believes he is GOD'S GIFT to women and 
a man who remembers that a woman was GOD'S GIFT to MAN.

And then teach OUR SONS to be that kind of man. 

I agree with all of these things. However, as a mom of three daughters, I think there is something more important to teach our daughters and our sons. We can teach them all of these things but if they do not have a foundation of why they should expect this or why they should treat someone this way, then I am not sure that it means the same thing.

There are different kinds of love found in the Bible. One is Eros love. This is what our teenagers are beginning to feel. This is the human level of love. The attraction and the heart fluttering thing. I have always told my girls when these feelings come along that they aren't always real. Now, I know to them they feel real and sometimes they may be the beginning of something real, but more times than not it is just that. A feeling based on emotions that they have not taken the time to sort out.


There is also Phileo love. This is the friendship kind of love. That comfortable feeling that you feel with your best friend. This is the part that needs to be developed early in a relationship. I always encourage my girls when they first meet a boy to ask lots of questions. Find out who they are quickly. Find out if you have something more in common than just thinking that each other are cute. When you are married to your best friend, it sure makes life fun.


Then there is Agape love. This is God's kind of love. It is supreme and unconditional. It is patient and it is kind. It does not envy or boast and it is not proud. It does not dishonor or serve self. It is not easily angered or keep score. It does not delight in wrong but rejoices in truth. It protects. It trusts. It hopes and it will last. This kind of love, when it comes from both people, never fails.


That is the goal I have for my children. I want them to choose a partner that knows these things too. I know that it seems silly to most people to talk to our teenagers about marriage and about true love, but if we are going to allow them to attach their hearts and feelings to someone then we better set the standard or they will set it to what is around them. All of the things in the quote are the result of the foundation. When we teach them Who sets the standard and help them navigate through the feelings, then we are helping to build a foundation that will not crumble.


I teach all of my girls to guard their hearts. Don't get caught up in feelings that can mislead you. Don't just date because everyone else is. Don't allow yourself to get in a situation where your feelings are dictating your actions. Even the little teenage crushes teach our children what relationships are about. They learn early and quickly.


Let's teach them the difference in what God's Word says about love and what the world says. Let's teach them the difference between God's relationship rules and the world's rules. Let's talk about what real Love is versus Hollywood love. Let's show them that when you choose His way there are rewards and blessings beyond measure.

And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 

You shall teach them diligently to your children, 

and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, 

and when you walk by the way, 

and when you lie down, and when you rise.

Deuteronomy 6:6-7

My Daily Inspiration and Hope

I guard my morning quiet time. Over the years it has become my lifeline. For so long, I looked at quiet time or devotion as a chore. Something that I had to do to be spiritual. Something that had to be done a certain way. At a certain time. For a required length of time to be effective.


I worked so hard at it. I got so frustrated when it didn't work out or I couldn't make myself sit still or stay focused. Guilt creeped in because I was working and striving instead of being still. I thought that in order for it to count and for God to hear me that I had to look and act a certain way or I had to pray and say certain things. Silly, right?


When I began my daily journal about 5 years ago, the first thing I did was write a covenant. I wrote that I was covenanting with God to meet with Him daily and to seek His presence. That was it. Anything else would be an added bonus. No time restraint. No formula or outline or method. Just me, my journal and God. I wrote a long journal entry that day pouring out my frustration. Asking for forgiveness for not making this decision sooner. As I wrote and asked God to show me what a daily time with Him looked like, I wrote the following sentence... "Did you not recognize Me all these years as you were just living your daily stuff?"


All those nights that I rocked crying babies. All those early mornings when I waited quietly for the rest of the house to wake up. All those afternoons that I was so exhausted that I was wondering if I would make it to bed time. All those times I was driving back and forth from my house to my parents house wondering how I could split my time and make everyone happy. All those times I thought the laundry room would explode because there was just not enough time in the day. All those times my heart ached because I was convinced that one of my girls hated me for punishing them. All those days that I said a quick prayer or called out in desperation or simply sat down and listened for a second.


He was still there. It didn't feel very quiet. I wasn't giving Him all my attention. I wasn't writing down my thoughts and prayers but He was still there. He heard me. He answered me. He loved me the whole time. He met me where I was until I could meet Him where I needed to be.


Some days I sit for 5 minutes. Some days I sit for an hour. Some days I read out of my devotion books. Some days I just read scripture. Some days I read nothing. Some days I cry out on my knees. Some days I just talk.  My schedule is easier to navigate these days so it is usually always around the same time every day. But that has looked different over the years. Whatever the time of day is or the length of time I sit or the amount of reading, writing, praying or listening I do, He always meets me there. Every single time.


So today I encourage you to put down your own expectations. Pick up a journal, a devotion book and your Bible. Stop for just a little while. Wherever "there" is... the carpool line, the laundry room, the kitchen table, your special place. He is already there and waiting. He will meet you there. Every single time.

"Lord, forgive me that I have so little time to spend on my knees. Raising children and running a busy house, I have to do most of my praying 'on the hoof' as it were. But, Lord, You know my heart is kneeling." 

~ Ruth Bell Graham

If mama ain't happy...

I have journaled for a number of years now.  It is something I always wanted to do but never seemed to be able to actually accomplish on a daily basis. At the end of 2006, I made a choice to meet with God every morning. To write out my prayers and my thoughts. I wrote a covenant with God that I would not put pressure on myself or feel guilt if I once again failed to follow through. I found a journal devotion book that had a short story and a few scripture verses with lines along the side of the page to write your thoughts. I have been journaling ever since.


On mornings that I find a few extra moments to spend, I look back at the date of that day over the years. It is so enlightening, humbling and entertaining. Sometimes I have no idea what I was talking about or praying for, but other times I was more detailed and I can close my eyes and be back in that moment. God is so faithful to show me where I was and where He has brought me.


Yesterday I had one of those times when I was looking back. On that day in 2008, I wrote a prayer. I have no idea what I must have read that prompted it but this is what I wrote... "I pray that I can change the saying 'if mama ain't happy, then nobody is happy' to ' if mama is full of Joy then the whole family is full of Joy'".


As mothers, we hold more power in our homes than we probably realize. I have really been convicted of this over the years. For so long, I would parent and love out of my emotions. If I was happy or felt good then things went well. If I was tired or mad, then things did not. I could change the mood of the whole house with one word or one look. As I allowed myself to take a really hard look at this reality, I began to pray fervently that things would change.


Whether I am married or not, whether my husband is home every night or out of town all week, whether I have one child or six; the choice is mine each day. I can run out of my own strength or I can draw my strength from Him. It is never easy. Every day looks and feels different.


Everything usually comes down to perspective. I can view the world and my circumstances through my natural eyes or I can choose to look up and see things through faith. It is the end of the week and I am tired. But, today I choose to finish strong. Want to join me?


At the end of that same journal entry, I wrote this... "if I could start each day with the same perspective that I end each day with, then I might live the moments in between differently."


The Joy of the Lord is my strength. I hope my family can see that today.

Sister Friend

There have been times over the years that I really wondered if my girls even liked each other. There is 2 1/2 years between the older two and 3 1/2 years between the younger two. So, we have always been in different stages, different schools, and everyone had different friends. They were all close enough in age to pick on each other but far enough apart in age to not always understand each other. They have never all been in the same school and except for a few years, we were always in three different schools.


This year, my older two find themselves in a new season. They are in the same school again. But this time, they are not children. They are both young adults. And my heart has been blessed watching their friendship grow into something new. Katie is the typical oldest child and big sister. She is a nurturer by nature and she has been so sweet to her sister during her transition to a huge university. Ansley appears to be completely self-sufficient and sure of herself on the outside; but it has been very evident how much she has appreciated and needed her sister during this transition. I have always prayed that my girls would have a bond that would carry them through the tough times of life. I am watching those prayers be answered.


Sisters can make really good friends. Not always, but if we allow ourselves to love unconditionally, a sibling can be that friend that sticks with us through all lives ups and downs. They are family. They know everything about us. And they love us anyway.


As I was having my quiet time this morning, the scripture reading was Proverbs 18:24. "One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a Friend who sticks closer than a brother." In this case, a sister.


I love my friends. I love my brother. When life is hard and I need a hug, I have those people that I can run to. The physical touch or verbal affirmation that I need is found with those people. But, when it is dark and everything is quiet, my spirit needs more. The Bible is very clear that we can have a Friend that sticks closer.


Don't you love it when you are reading a scripture and then the Lord confirms it somewhere else for you. As I continued my quiet time this morning I read this in my Jesus Calling devotion, "I created your brain with the capacity to know Me as Friend and Lord simultaneously." Jesus can be our everything.


If you have a friend that feels like a sister or a brother or you have a sister or brother that is your best friend, then count your blessings. Guard that friendship and be a good friend back. Love them at all times and enjoy the hugs and smiles. But for those times when you still feel alone and you just need someone Who sticks a little bit closer, remember these things:

A friend can cry with you but Jesus can wipe away all your tears.

A friend can pray with you but Jesus can answer your prayers.

A friend can share your storm but Jesus can calm your storm.

A friend can stand by you but Jesus can stand for you.

So today, as you are being a friend or needing a friend; remember that you are fearfully and wonderfully made with a built-in Friend who sticks so close and never leaves you or forsakes you. Reflect that friendship to those around you and tell them that they can have that kind of Friend too.

Stay tuned...

Have you looked at a list of TV shows lately? I think every other show is some sort of reality show. I am with the rest of the world on this one. I do love a good reality show. Notice, I said a good reality show. Some of them are just pure trash, but a lot are very entertaining. I spend a whole hour getting all caught up in the adventure or the predicament or the lives of the contestants and then the end comes. Before you can catch your breath, the announcer says, "Stay tuned for scenes from our next episode". And, they have you. I have to tune in next time to see what happens.

Life is like that isn't it. Our daily reality is always an adventure. Some days are good. Some days are bad. Some days we want to end before they start and some days we wish could go on forever.

This morning I made a quick phone call to one of my oldest and dearest friends. I wanted to celebrate an accomplishment of one of her daughters. To a lot of people it did not look like a huge praise, but to those who have been along for the ride it was huge. Ten years ago the reality of this girl's life looked very different. Her story was one of tragedy, poor choices and heartbreak. But God had other plans. He knew the scenes from her next episode. And He allowed those of us who were willing to go along for the ride a chance to stand in the gap for her. A chance to lift up her mom when she could not see any way out. A chance to watch Him do a miracle.

I love hindsight. It is so much clearer and easier to see God's plan when we look backwards. But He offers us the chance to look forward each day in faith; remembering the scenes of our past and basking in the praises of our present. We walk into our future with trust because we can't see our next episode. He can though.

This morning I was praying for my future. The future of my girls and of my husband. I was praying for clarity and for wisdom. I was praying for purity of heart and for courage to take the next step. I feel this episode of my reality show coming to an end. I am praying that we finish strong. I can hear the Announcer saying, "Stay tuned for scenes from your next episode".

And He has me. I have hindsight to remember the great things He has done for me, for my husband, for my children and for my friends. I have His promises that He has a plan. It is a plan to prosper and not to harm. He promises that what He began will be carried out to completion. He promises that He will work all things together for good because I love Him. He promises that if I trust in Him with all my heart and don't lean on my own understanding then He will make my path straight.

So today I encourage you to look up. Stay tuned. He knows the scenes from your next episode. They are going to give you Hope and a future. He promises!

A Safe Place

When I close my eyes and think about my daddy, I usually remember what it felt like to sit in his lap and bury my head into his chest. That feeling of security and warmth and love comes crashing back into my reality. I was blessed to have a father that provided me that feeling of security. I think that is why when my world is crashing around me, I bury myself in my husband's arms and chest. It is the same feeling. I feel safe and protected and loved.


Last night Danny returned late from being gone for two days. My youngest was not feeling good. She had been in her room studying and when she heard him come in she came downstairs. I watched as she came over to the sofa and curled up beside her daddy. She wrapped her arms around him and cuddled down so that her head was buried in his chest. She felt safe and protected and loved.


My oldest daughter is my most affectionate. She is open with her hugs and her physical touch. She gives it freely to all of us. She likes to be hugged in return too. This weekend, as we were getting ready to have some heavy discussions during dinner, I felt her head go on my chest as the blessing was being said. She needed a safe place for a moment as she prepared for something that made her uncomfortable.


My middle daughter is my least affectionate. She is not one to run in and hug you. She doesn't do the "touchy, feely" thing. But she knows where her safe places are. I remember one time during her senior year of high school. She came home after a very heated and emotional discussion with a friend. He had said some things that crushed her spirit and her heart. I was sitting in the den and I heard her come in the kitchen. Before I knew it, she was in my lap sobbing in my chest. She needed to feel safe and protected and loved.


As I was reflecting on my safe place this morning, I was thinking about how blessed I am to have people in my life that make me feel safe. I am not physically feeling well today and I was having a hard time staying focused during my quiet time. I was curled up in my chair enjoying the feeling of protection and security.  As I was reading my devotion and reading scripture, I felt the Lord say very gently to me..."are you a safe place for others?".


I have learned a lot over the years about being a "beacon on the hill". A light to a dark world. I have spent a lot of time realizing that in order to move forward I have to quit looking inward and look up. As my spiritual walk has deepened and my fears have lessened, I have learned a lot about myself. I am very opinionated and usually speak my mind freely. It is my very worst trait. My biggest weakness. But over the years, the Lord has taken that impulse and changed it into a strength. When I have allowed Him to guide that impulse, He has used it mightily in others lives.


It is important that the people around me know where my strength comes from. That anyone who has a conversation with me can sense that there is something different in the way I respond to them. I mess this up a lot; but I have a safe place to go to that helps me regain my strength and look up. My earnest prayer is that I can be a safe place to the lives I encounter daily. That the people that cross my path can feel safe and protected and loved. Not judged.


If you know Jesus, then you have a safe place too. Sit back today and lean against His knees. Rest in the warmth of His everlasting arms. Bury your head in His chest and feel protected and loved. Then lift your head up and walk forward in that security. Keep your eyes open today for that person that needs a safe place. That person that is just waiting to be loved and not judged. Wrap your arms around someone today that looks like they need it. It may be the only hug they get all day!

I will dwell in the shelter of the Most High God

I will rest in the beauty of your presence 

Your faithfulness is a shield and my great reward

I will not be afraid, I will trust in the Lord ~ Dwell, by Aaron Keyes

We Cultivate what we Celebrate...

What a fun weekend. All my girls were in their own rooms. In their own beds. All at the same time for a whole weekend. My house was full. My heart was full too.

We had a big dinner on Friday night when everyone got home. I cooked all of their favorites. Everyone was represented by a dish. We laughed and told stories and ate. We sat around the table and I smiled that there were no empty seats.

My older two even got up at 7:30am on Saturday morning to drive an hour away for their little sister's cross country meet. I have always learned the most about my girls on long car rides. This one was no different. They shared their stories. They shared their frustrations. But most of all they shared part of their hearts. It never fails that if you stay in the car long enough, they start to tell you things. For us, it hasn't changed.

We spent Saturday night doing wedding planning. We worked on the guest list and talked about the logistics of the event. We had dinner with the in-laws and made sure we were all on the same page. We went over all the wedding stuff. Who does what. How it will look. What the bride and groom want from the day. All the checklist items. We talked about it all. Good, bad and indifferent. We laid out a plan. We are all moving in the same direction now.

On Sunday morning we all sat side by side in church. We worshipped together. We opened God's Word together. We hugged on friends. I got to watch my girls be loved on by their church community. They waited patiently after church while their dad and I prayed with some people. It is still the same as it has always been. We then went to yet another meal and laughed some more. A table for five. Again, my heart smiled.

Before everyone left, we went on a shopping spree. Dad opted out of this adventure. We bought a few treats. Made a wish list for the holidays. Bought a few essentials. We even cheered on one sister as she made a major purchase with her own money she had been saving. Both sisters and mom assuring her that they were the cutest boots we had ever seen and the purchase was a good one. More laughing. More stories. More memories etched in my mind and in my heart.

The older two packed up their stuff; put all the laundry that we did back in the car and headed back to school. I checked their rooms to make sure nothing was left. I cleaned up a little behind them and then shut their doors until the next time they came home. Bittersweet.

The lone sister left in the house did some homework, studied for a test with a friend and ended the day with yogurt at Five Spot. We celebrated the fact that she was chosen as one of the runners of the week for her cross country team. She ran a 4 minute PR! Exhausted. Happy. I went to bed content and blessed.

My pastor has said for as long as I can remember that we cultivate what we celebrate. As my girls have gotten older, the wisdom of that statement has become increasingly clear to me. It is true for all parts of life; but for our families it is crucial. Celebrate the times you are together; there will be a time when that changes. Celebrate your children's stories and their accomplishments. Celebrate their good choices. Celebrate their ideas and their thoughts. Celebrate who they are. One day you will look back and realize that the environment you cultivated in your home and in their hearts will reap rewards for years and generations to come. When we celebrate life, we cultivate lives that want to celebrate with others. We pour into the next generation and they will pour into the generation after them. Cultivation produces a bountiful harvest and that is always worth celebrating!

Interruptions and Insight

I am doing a study on the life of Jonah. Who would have ever thought that there would be so much insight in a little book of the Bible about a guy who ran away from God and got swallowed by a great big fish?


I have hosted a Wednesday night ladies Bible study in my home for almost 8 years now. We have taken time off here and there for different reasons; but for the most part, my den is full of women on Wednesday evenings. The faces have changed over the years. Some have been here the whole time. Some have come in and out and some are new this study. Every time I start a new study, I pray for the women that God wants to be here. And He never disappoints. But it never looks the way I think it will.


The name of this study is Jonah: Navigating a Life Interrupted. And who can not relate to interruptions? The women that sit in my den week after week have had some pretty heavy interruptions in their lives. Some have lost children. Some have lost spouses. Some have lost marriages. Some have lost jobs. There are the moms who are navigating the world of young children and moms that are learning what life is like when their children leave home. There are women navigating God's call on their lives and where He is leading them. There are women learning to face their fears and women who are learning to navigate a life away from the lies they have believed for so long.  The wisdom and "life knowledge" in that one room is astounding.


This week we talked about what interruptions look like and how we respond to them. As we shared what we had learned in our homework, it occurred to me that we seem to focus on the "big" interruptions of life because they are so obvious. But what about the everyday, every hour, even every minute interruptions?


Jonah was called by God to switch directions in the middle of a life that was going pretty well. He was told to go to a place that, not only was he scared of, but that was full of people he thought were beyond reach. Talk about a big interruption. We can relate to the reason he ran, can't we? But what about those little things that change our direction everyday. Those feelings. Those people. Those children. That spouse. That job. How do we respond to those interruptions?


One of my favorite quotes is by A. W. Tozer. "What comes to our mind when we think about God is the most important thing about us." How true is that? When those little interruptions come, how do we view them? What do they make us think about God?


At the end of each week of study there is a section to write down the main principles that most impacted us and can be of help to us as we journey through the interrupted life. These were my points this week:


1. What is my perspective of God? Do I see Him as an interruption?
2. Can I be used by God in a significant way?
3. What part of God do people see in my story?
4. Am I taking ownership in something that I should just be managing?
5. If the ultimate goal is for Jesus to be known among men and the nations, what is my part and calling?


As I end another busy week and look forward to a busy weekend, I am thinking about these questions. What about you? How do you feel about life's interruptions? What are you learning about God through them? I would love to hear your thoughts and your stories!

Royal Reality

I have spent a lot of time looking at wedding stuff lately. It is very time consuming but lots of fun. It takes a considerable amount of time to prepare and plan for the big day. Everything builds on something else. You have to have the list to determine the venue. You need to decide on colors in order to pick flowers. You have to put down deposits to hold the date. I mean, who books events 12 to 18 months in advance? You would be surprised!


As I switch to wedding mode on the days when I can, I find myself thinking a lot about my girls and their futures. When they were little I remember them dressing up like a bride. I think most little girls began to dream of their wedding very early. In some form or another. Today, as I was remembering them all dressed up for their pretend weddings; I was trying to remember when we began to talk about the real thing.


I have always had a very open and honest relationship with my girls. They know that our home is a safe place to talk about anything they want to. We try really hard to keep the "no, I am not appalled that you just said that" look on our faces. But as they got older the thought of "how in the world do you even know that" was harder to cover up! Our kitchen table has heard a lot of conversations over the years. Poor Dad. He has heard a lot over the years too. More than he probably wanted to know; but he hangs in there with us. God bless him.


I am not sure when the topic of marriage replaced the idea of a wedding. It was just a natural progression as we waded through the tricky waters of boys and relationships and dating. You really cannot do justice to those topics without bringing marriage into the discussion at some point. Of course, it depends on what your goal is. For our family, we believe that marriage is a picture of Christ and the church. If our girls find a man they want to spend the rest of their life with, then marriage is the end result.


As we have discovered what each one of our girls bent is and what their thoughts are on the opposite sex, we have encouraged them to think about what they are looking for in a future husband. Danny started praying for their future spouse from the time he put them into their cribs at night. We aren't obsessive with marriage talk; we just have given them something to think about over the years. We offer advice and show them scripture and give them a plumb line to measure their choices against. When poor choices have been made, we have something concrete to base our opinions on. God has a plan for their future; but our girls have a choice.


When the Royal Wedding came on TV, my girls set the alarm, got up and planted themselves in the den floor to watch. There were moms and college girls throwing parties to celebrate the big event. It was a modern day fairy tale and the world got to watch. The girl was actually getting her prince. 


As they went off to school and the pictures were plastered all over for hours that morning, I wrote the following note to each of my girls:


"You are already a princess. You are each a daughter of the King. Pick a boy who loves the King too. The fairy tale is possible. He has a plan for each of you! ~ love, Mom."


The world throws so much at our children. They are given false information and sometimes even down right lies about what will make them happy. But, we as parents, have a voice too. It is louder and more effective than we think. Today, the Lord has encouraged me to keep the plumb line of open, honest communication and His truth before my children. He has a plan and they have a choice. The information, opinions and prayers we offer them shapes their perspective of the future. And what they think will determine the choices they make.

A Peek at a Proposal

My oldest daughter got engaged this summer. It was a wonderful time of excitement, family and celebration. Trey, my future son-in-law allowed us to be a part of the day. Both families went early to Christ Church in St. Simons Island, GA to witness the event from afar. We set up the site per his exact instructions then found our places behind the church to wait and watch. My heart is still full from the experience. It was a beautiful day. A great way to begin a new life. It set the groundwork for their foundation they will build upon during their marriage... take a peek!

This is the scene that awaited her. Did I mention that she had no idea what was about to happen?

When she saw this, of course, she knew that something was up. He sat her down and told her not to speak. Just listen. He had a lot to say. They began by taking communion together remembering what Christ had done for them separately and agreeing to join together in covenant.

He then washed her feet symbolizing his willingness to serve her and to be a servant with her in their new life together.

He then read to her from the new Bible that was inscribed with her new last name. He read from Ephesians 5. And then he turned to Proverbs 31:10. That passage was marked by the ribbon mark and another very special gift.

Then the time came... "Will you marry me and spend a lifetime with me?"

She said... "Yes!!!!"

We all began to emerge from our hiding places. Carefully entering into this emotional scene. As he prayed over her and she recovered from all that she had just heard and seen, we surrounded them with our presence, our love, our commitment and our excitement. She turned around and the first thing she saw was her daddy...

It was a great day. A day that we were blessed to be a part of. A day that was documented in pictures. A day that is etched forever in our hearts and minds. A day that glorified the Lord. And now the fun begins. The planning. The preparations. The excitement leading up to that day in June.