Untangling life... Revisited

I wrote the following post last December. Since then this same friend has reminded me to greet each morning with "breathless expectation". During this season of Advent and all the craziness that goes along with the commercial part of the season, I have been reminded again of just how messy life can be. But I was also reminded that God chose to send His son to be born in a "stinky barn and trough". Right in the middle of the messy. Thousands of years later we welcome Him again with breathless expectation... all we need to do is make room:

I read an Advent devotion early this morning. It reminded me that Advent is about waiting. This was my favorite line in the devotion: "Those who do not know how it feels to struggle anxiously with the deepest questions of life, of their life, and to patiently look forward with anticipation until the truth is revealed, cannot even dream of the splendor of the moment in which clarity is illuminated for them."

I have a beautiful, sweet friend who knows all about waiting. About praying for a child. For life to change. For better choices to be made. For the truth to be revealed. And for the clarity to be illuminated. After we had breakfast one morning, she looked at me with tears streaming and asked me why it all has to be so hard. Why? I didn't have an answer.

She sent me a text the other day. She shared how God had spoken to her heart while she was putting up her Christmas lights. As she cried out to Him for answers, He gently shared some comforting insight that warmed her heart and gave her a little hope and peace. The answer was just for her. The clarity that helped illuminate His presence in her situation. All while she was untangling her Christmas lights. Part of her text read: "In my spirit as I untangled the lights I felt Him say 'I know what it feels like to see my Son hurting'. He helped me know that He understands a grieving parents heart."

This season of Advent is about waiting. About waiting to see what is inside that beautifully wrapped present under the tree. About waiting for the celebration of Truth to come. All while we are untangling our lives. Struggling with the deep questions. Waiting for the clarity that will be illuminated in our spirits just like the lights on the tree. Finding a way to be still enough to just know.

Abraham waited a long time for the promise of his son. He untangled a lot of life along the way. Sarah laughed as she untangled what she heard. Jacob wrestled with God as he untangled life. David made poor choices as he untangled his lies. Jonah ran away as he untangled his calling. Peter denied as he untangled all that he had just experienced. Saul persecuted and then Paul untangled his past. But the clarity came for each of them when the promises were revealed. In the waiting, they learned about Truth.

I don't know what part of your life you are untangling during this season. Or if maybe this season is filled with illumination for you. But I do know that as you enjoy the beauty of untangled lights shining brightly around you, remember Who we are waiting for. The Light of the world. The Love that came down and lived among us. The Truth that will set you free. And in the end all the lights of life will be untangled and every eye will see. And, that my friends is worth the wait.

Merry Christmas sweet friends. May the anticipation in your waiting be realized in abounding joy and blessings!

Mary kept all these things to herself, 

holding them dear, deep within herself. 

The sheepherders returned and let loose, 

glorifying and praising God for everything 

they had heard and seen. 

It turned out exactly the way they’d been told!

Luke 2:19-20 the message

My mother's heart...

I have been watching the Publix commercial (it gets me every time) and all of the emails and promotions and reminders about Mother's Day. And I have been thinking about my own mother's heart... the one that is being worn on my sleeve at the moment. The one feeling some of the same pains as my body did in labor. The one swelling with pride and breaking with endings all at the same time.

I remember making an intentional promise to myself years back that I would raise these girls to know not only Who they were created by and for but to know who they were in the reality of that. To walk through their lives with intention toward the bigger picture not just wade through life with the goal of becoming an adult and being on their own. I wanted them to possess those qualities that I so obviously lacked. The ability to stare fear in the face and say my God is bigger. The faith to believe what His word says even when others think they are crazy. The assurance of things to come not things that can be seen. Looking wisely into the future with intentional planning while living fully in each moment.

I have not done it all right or really even well. I have failed more times than I have succeeded. I have learned to ask forgiveness through the three sweet faces who have heard me say I am sorry more than anyone. I have learned to always say I love you over and over and over again. No matter how annoyed they get. I text it. I write it. I leave messages saying it. And I try to show it.

If there is one thing I have learned in this stage of mothering, it is to go with what you know. Even if you haven't been intentional with your relationships with your children, you know their hearts. Speak into them. The good stuff. The hard stuff. The discipline and the encouragement. Simply let your mother's heart pour into theirs. Speaking Truth. Showing Grace.

And be willing to stay the course. Whether it is rocking a crying one night after night or standing firm in discipline with the 16 year old who you are convinced simply hates you. Don't quit. Walk it through. This world might legally say that an 18 year old is an adult but any mother knows that is far from the truth. No one just wakes up one day and because of a date on the calendar they simply have all the wisdom and knowledge and emotional ability to make adult decisions. They don't know how to work at a job or handle their finances or deal with the adult world just because they turned another year older. Those things are taught and shaped and molded over years of intentional parenting. And a mother's heart knows how to do that. Trust it.

A mother's heart is an anchor that holds her children. The dry dock of safety that the ship can come back to for repairs. Whether they are 20 or 46. There is a part of every child's heart that searches for blessings in the heart of their mother.

 As I watched the mini series about the Bible, I was struck by the scene of Mary watching from the foot of that Cross. Feeling and seeing with a mother's heart. Knowing the Truth but living the reality. In a perfect world, all mothers want their children. Actually choose to give birth to their children. Care for and nurture their children. Love them and teach them and mold their character. Stay the course all the way through their adult years. But, we don't live in a perfect world. We live the reality of a broken, hurting, sin-filled world.

And that reality is that some of us had great mothers to show us how. Some of us did not. Some of us are moms. Some of us are not. Some of us still have our moms. Some of us do not. Some of us feel like good moms. Some of us do not. Some of us are appreciated as moms. Some of us are not. Some of us have kids that are doing "it right". Some of us do not.  Some of us want so desperately to be a mom. Some of us do not. The reality is some of us have blown it. Some of us have regret and guilt and sadness and pain that feels like it might kill us. Some of us have given up. Some of us are just tired.

But all of us have a Father that is bigger than our mother's heart. In fact, He knows everything in our mother's heart. The fear. The longing. The overwhelming love that hurts at times. And His Grace is sufficient to allow our grace to be too. Trust Him with your heart. And He will restore the years. Redeem the time. Repair the walls. Renew the hope. Reveal the future.

Don't believe the lies. Being a mother is a calling. A job. A life long journey. Stay tied to the One that gives life and let Him guide your way...

He will feed his flock like a shepherd. 

He will carry the lambs in his arms, 

holding them close to his heart. 

He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young. 

Isaiah 40:11 NLT

Serving this summer...

So many of you have asked how you could pray for Ansley this summer, so here is the
overview of what she will be doing. She will be living with a family in Fish Hoek on the coast of South Africa. She will be doing ministry in the local church youth group, traveling with several medical teams to HIV clinics and to serve villages, serving in orphanages and even staying for a few days in a trash dump where families live. She will be working several days a week in the local daycare loving on the children. This is an opportunity to seek ideas and God's leading about her future work/life plans. If you have any questions or would like to send her a note of encouragement, send me an email and I will pass it along! Thanks for loving her and for caring and praying for her summer! It makes my heart smile...

Declare his glory among the nations, 

his marvelous works among all the peoples!

Psalm 96:3

25 reasons...

Today I have been married for 25 years. I started dating him 3 years before we got married. I was 18.

There are times it feels like yesterday and there are times it seems a life time ago that we met. But today, I love him more than I ever thought possible so many years ago. Here are few reasons why:




1. He truly cares about other people. Really. He is not fake.

 2. He is very sure of himself. That makes me feel safe.

 3. He does not care to "fit the mold". He is exactly who he claims to be. He is an original.

 4. He is full of integrity. His yes is yes. Always.

 5. He is a hard worker. 

 6. He loves the outdoors.

 7. He is a man's man. Strong. Courageous. Resourceful.

 8. He is competitive. If he doesn't know how to do it, he will figure it out.

 9. He planned for our future.

10. He is a provider. Financially. Emotionally. Spiritually.

11. He is willing to learn. Things he wants to know and the things he needs to know.

12. He is the father of my children. And loves them each well.

13. He knows how to paint nails. (fingers and toes) And he is good at it.

14. He can sit at the dinner table and almost keep up with 4 conversations at once.

15. He disciplined his girls when they needed it. With love and because he loves them.

16. He knows each one of his daughters individually. Who they are. What they like.

17. He loves to study the Bible. And to teach. He does it well.

18. He knows how to apologize and how to forgive.

19. He loves his parents. And mine.

20. He is a good friend. To others and to me.

21. He tells me he loves me. Everyday. And he means it.

22. He actually thinks I am beautiful. Still. He tells me everyday.

23. He is a good man.

24. He loves Jesus.

25. He is mine. And I am his.

The development of a really good marriage is not a natural process.

 It is an achievement. 

For such a time as this...

She was independent from birth. She was born 14 days after her due date. Then she made her entrance into this world in about 2 hours. Her timing. Her way. Nothing has changed.

She informed us when she was about 6 that she was going to be a missionary. I didn't even know that she knew what a missionary was. But that was what she was going to be. Then when she was a little older she decided that she was going to be a nurse. That was how she was going to get on the mission field. We went to a concert at our church given by an up and coming artist. She met the singer. They talked for a second. She asked for her autograph. The singer wrote these words: "To a little girl on her knees. Serve Him well." We were blown away.

She did a Bible Study when she was in 1st grade. It was an in-depth children's study of what the mom's were learning upstairs. She went every week. She did her homework. Under protest. But she did it with my help. We were studying Romans. At dinner, her father was speaking with her about an "incident" that had happened that day. In the middle of the lecture, right on cue and in context, she informs all of us that: "therefore, there is now no condemnation...". Again, we were blown away.

She went with her Daddy to Ecuador on her first mission trip. She was in 7th grade. We all four went the next year. Then one day after high school service, she met her Daddy in the hallway of church. She informed him that there was an available spot on the 6 week trip going to Peru. She was in 9th grade. She said she felt like she was supposed to go. She went. For all that time. Me. Blown away.

We were sitting at a soccer game the next year. A friend was with her. He told her about a trip that he was going on with another church. To do kids camps and sports camps. She was intrigued. It was to South Africa. The glimmer started in her eyes. She had that look. And a few months later, she boarded a plane with a group of adults and one friend her age. They flew to another continent. Without us. She had a blast. We were left home. Blown away.

The summer before her senior year she had another opportunity. Back to another part of South Africa. She met young people from a church over there. She lived with them for a month. She learned and she watched. And her heart was hooked. She has stayed in touch with them. She left for college and decided that her heart was for the abused. The abandoned. The unwanted children. She changed her major to Social Work. We have a friend. He told us about an internship opportunity. She inquired. She applied. And last week they answered. She can go and serve and love and fill her heart to overflowing. And now we stand here again. Blown away.

She can leave as early as 8 weeks from now. She might stay as late as the end of July. Living in the safe houses built for these children. The ones her heart loves already. She can live there with them. Everyday. For weeks and weeks. Amazing. 

I don't have all the details yet. I don't know the whole plan or the cost or the support needed. But I know this... I am blown away by this young woman. By her heart. By her passion and her courage and her willingness to know what she wants to do. She still blows me away. She knows who she is even when others question. She is sure of what she wants even when others don't understand. She is still stubborn and still strong willed. She doesn't always make the choices we would make. She doesn't care to fit the mold or play the part or even care what other people think of her. She has a plan. She has a passion. And she is willing to go see what it looks like and if it fits. Not because it is the thing that all the other church kids are doing. Not because she can spend the summer with all her friends. But simply because it is her heart and she wants to know if that is really where He is calling her.

So stay tuned. I will let you know when she has all the details. She will need support. She will need prayer. She will need encouragement. She will need people to rally around her and help her get there. But she believes with all her heart that this is her time. She was born for this. She was called to this. And she is willing to go. And we just stand here. Blown away...

"And who knows but that you have come 

to the kingdom for such a time as this 

and for this very occasion?" 

~ Esther 4:14 (amplified)

Stop and be still...

I cannot believe that we are half way through March already. Life has been so busy lately. I have not had the time to write or blog. I have tried to remain faithful to my morning quiet time but I have to be honest... it has been quick and short.

Isn't that the scheme of the enemy. Get us so busy that everything else seems to take priority. That the intentional time of just sitting at His feet gets pushed to the side. I have been studying for my Bible studies and reading a really good book at a painfully slow pace but none of that can take the place of simply being still and listening.

So today, I am curled in My Chair. Soaking in His goodness. Listening to His voice. Reading His word and writing the thoughts in my heart. I have been so distracted lately that I did not even realize the longing in my very soul for uninterrupted communion...

I think that sometimes we are so caught up in the craziness and the busyness and the needs and the wants that we forget that the longing that we feel is not for sleep or for rest but for Him. To sit in His presence. That is where we find the rest we seek. The answers we need. The time management we lack. It is there that we are filled to overflowing. It is there that we are blessed and loved and found. It is in the being still that we realize that we know.

There are so many big things coming around the corner for our family. Every one of us has big decisions to make. Big opportunities to pray about. Lots of things to sort out. We each need to discern between the good and His best. All together it can be overwhelming. But as I sit here this morning my perspective is coming back. The stillness is calming my soul. The closeness is so sweet and so real.

So today, sweet friends, stop and be still. His love never fails. He never gives up. He never lets go. No matter how much we spin ourselves out of control and into the crazies, we cannot escape His grasp.

Rest in that truth today. It is in the being still that we realize that we know the One who can give us immeasurably more than we could ever ask or even imagine...

"Give thanks to the Lord, call on His name. 

Look to the Lord and His strength, 

seek His face always." 

psalm 105: 1,4.

There's an App for that...

Over the years I have told many people that I would pray for them. I really meant it at the time. I would pray as they came to my mind or I remembered our conversation. And there is nothing wrong with that. Even when I would forget until after the surgery or the day or the event, God knew my heart.

About 2 years ago, I started "alarming" myself on my phone. If I told you that I would pray for you, I set an alarm. I got to the point that I would just pull my phone out and put you right in the calendar. One sweet lady got very offended at me. She could not understand why I could not just remember to pray for her. I explained to her that, for me, when I told someone that I would pray for them I needed to know that I was being truthful. And then, I asked her if I could pray for her right then. In the grocery store. In front of everyone. She was grateful and I learned a big lesson.

Prayer is so powerful. Whenever possible, pray in the moment. Right where you are. But, when that is not possible or you need to remember to pray at a specific time, there is actually an App for that! I found it today as I was reading Ann Voskamp's blog, www.aholyexperience.com.  Because she recommended it, I checked out the website. You can record different prayer categories. You can send yourself reminders. Even several a day or one every day of the week. You can even add the contact info and send an email or tweet right from the prayer notebook. I love it!

In case any of you are wondering, I would love to add you to my prayer notebook. I love that you can have all of your prayer request right there with you wherever you are. Check it out and send me your prayer request... I would be blessed to pray for you!

I thank my God every time I remember you. 

In all my prayers for all of you, 

I always pray with joy. 

Philippians 1:3-4.

At first we see dimly...

The fog is thick this morning. The view I usually have out my front door and off my back porch is muted. In some directions you can't even see the rooftops that outline the top of my fence. As I sat outside and looked, I could almost see clumps of the fog just hanging in the air. Distorting my view and covering from my eyes what my mind knows is really there. The longer I stood there in the quiet the more I was aware of the crackling sound on the leaves. It was so subtle but constant. The drizzle of the rain drops falling gently on the leaves. It became louder the longer I tuned in to the sound.

The sound interrupted my thoughts. For a second I was annoyed that my ears kept hearing the rustling and the rain, and I lost track of what I was thinking. Then, I heard it. "Listen to Me."

Life is like a foggy morning sometimes, isn't it? Thick and ominous. Not a clear view into the future. Or even into the next hour. Sometimes our eyes can't see what our mind knows is there. That is where Faith comes in. As we walk deeper into our relationship with God, His promises become sure in our mind. But sometimes our eyes can't see them. We have to trust that those promises are there and that they are for us.

When those circumstances or situations or emotions become so thick, they tend to cover and hover around us like the fog. Sometimes we can actually see the clumps of our doubt or our consequences or our situation just hanging there. Distorting our view of our Promises.

But if we still long enough to listen, we will begin to hear that subtle sound in the background. That still small Voice. The one whispering to us to stop thinking and start listening. Reminding us of what our mind knows. That Voice wants to interrupt your thoughts and clarify your Truth. As you learn to recognize it, you will notice that it becomes louder and clearer.

I don't know what fog is covering your life right now. But I do know the One that does. Listen to that Voice. As the fog lifts, you will have your sight back. But for now, just be still and listen. He always has something to say...

We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, 

peering through a mist. But it won’t be long 

before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! 

We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, 

knowing him directly just as he knows us! 

1 Corinthians 13:12 the message

Lessons learned...

Don't you love it when God teaches the whole family a lesson? Not the "shame on you" kind but the look how big I AM kind? It is so humbling and so sweet to watch. Especially when one of your children are the source of the lesson that blesses all.

We just recently got a front row seat to watch God go before us. And we all were reminded once again that God's ways are not our ways. That He will fight for us. That He can and will work all things together for good. And that what the enemy means for evil, He can turn to good. Those rich truths you can quote to your children but are best lived through experience.

We have several "God lessons" with our older two that we remind them of still. We use those moments to keep us in check as a family and to remind us of the power of praying first. Two of the most powerful lessons learned involved their adults of influence in their lives. Adults in charge but not necessarily of the same mind set as their family. In both situations the line of teaching your children respect and a work ethic were blurred with the lesson of adults aren't always right in their choices and actions. It is a very hard line to navigate with young children. Both times we chose to pray with each daughter and together as a family, and simply ask God what to do. We chose to let our girls use their voice instead of us fighting for them. Both times we were blown away by how God went before them and fought the battle for them. God actually brought one of the adults, a teacher, into our home and into my Bible Study. Week after week, one daughter got to watch her teacher discover the sweetness of the God who had fought the battle for her. This teacher that everyone loved to talk about and "hate". We watched this teacher that only lasted 1 year in the school learn an eternity of lessons. It was a priceless lesson for us all.

Recently we helped one daughter understand that perception can't always be controlled. How others perceive a situation may cause you to be judged or blamed. Sometimes only God knows the truth. But again, as we prayed over the situation and gave our daughter the tools she needed, God showed up. He went before her and smoothed the path. We watched her gain confidence in who we knew she was. We watched as a mentor helped her find her voice. As a young girl under her influence actually apologized for part of the situation. And as the adults in charge recognized and affirmed the efforts made by our sweet girl. Nothing earth shattering to anyone else, but life changing for us as we watched God work. And another story of God's goodness to add to the list.

We all have stories of how and when God shows up in our lives. Share them with your children. Discover them as a family. Give God the glory and remind yourselves of them often. Your family "history" is full of "His story". Don't let the lessons go unnoticed. Jesus taught in parables and stories. As parents, we can do the same. Share the stories. Share the grace. Share the lessons learned...

"Humble yourselves, therefore, 

under God's mighty hand, 

that He may lift you up in due time. 

Cast all your anxiety on Him 

because He cares for you." 

1 Peter 5:6-7

Because I can...

I scooted out of here yesterday at 2:30. I came rushing back in at 9:30 this morning. I made a quick trip to love on the married one. She called. I rearranged. And then I went.

Someone asked me why I was driving all that way just for a few hours. I answered before I realized it. I said, "Because I can." As I drove those now familiar roads, I thought about my answer. I am in a time and season of my life that for now I can go when I want to. I still had to rearrange the schedule and provide for the little one, but we are all in a season of life that allows for these last minute decisions.

As I thought about all of that as I drove, I called my wonderful husband. I said thank you for being a large part of why I can. Because of decisions and provisions made through the years by him, I can. Because of sacrifices by him to allow me to have a relationship with my daughter, she actually made that phone call. The one that asked. The one that I answered with I can.

As I pulled into her driveway, I received a phone call from my sweet son-in-law. He did not know that I was in his driveway. He called for another reason. But I got the chance to share with him too. I said thank you for loving my daughter so well. For providing for her and for caring for her. He thanked me for being there when he wasn't. I explained to him that the blessing was all mine. All girls need their moms throughout life. Whether mom is actually able to be there or not, there are times in every girls' life that she just needs her mom. And this time I was there. Because I can.

It won't always be this easy. I can't possibly be everywhere that my girls need or want me. But for today I can. And I am thankful. And grateful. And blessed. I sat in that driveway waiting for my daughter to arrive home from work and I thanked Jesus. For the blessings of being a mom. For the Grace given me through the years with all the wrong decisions made. The hurtful words spoken. The failures and the flaws. It is only through His mercy and forgiveness that I can be a mom. That I survived this long with my relationships with my daughters in tact. I didn't do a lot of it right or even well but because of Jesus, I can rest in the blessings. Because of Jesus, I can.

For I can do everything through Christ, 

who gives me strength. 

Philippians 4:13

Hands On...

We are working on a big book at work. It is for an organization that serves people. And families. We have printed it for years. And with all the technology out there, nothing can finish the job short of "hands on" collating. There are lots of options but there is no way to actually produce the final product without each book being touched by human hands and finished.

Now believe me, I have whined enough to know that there is no other option than to work book by book, tab by tab until the job is finished. Hands on. Each book. No exceptions. As I stood over the large task today, I started thinking... what if Jesus had whined about the "hands on" task at hand?

Instead, He became flesh and walked among us. Us. The sinners of the world that had no hope short of a "hands on" job. Hands that turned the water into wine. Hands that healed the lame. Hands that brushed the eyes of the blind and gave them sight. Hands that touched the leper when no one else would. Hands that drew a line in the sand. Hands that held the little children. Hands that lifted Peter from the water. Hands that washed the feet of His followers. Hands that carried His own cross.

Those Hands had options. But He chose to touch each life. Hands on. No exceptions. Every life given the choice of eternal life. Each life's experiences being filtered through the loving hands of the Father. Outstretched hands pierced for our transgressions. Hands touched by a doubter in His resurrected state. Reaching through walls to comfort His disciples. 

Those Hands can still lift your chin to see His face. They can still wrap around you in Peace that passes all understanding. They can comfort and they can protect. Reach out and grab hold... you are a "Hands on" job in progress...

Then he said to Thomas, 

“Put your finger here; see my hands. 

Reach out your hand and put it into my side. 

Stop doubting and believe.” 

 John 20:27

Listen...

Finally! My word for the year is... Listen. I have been praying all week about it. Thinking about it for the last few weeks. Yesterday I thought that I had heard that word but just wasn't sure. But that is what kept coming to my mind. LISTEN.

So, yesterday as I was talking with a friend about seasons and change and prayer, it just hit me. The answer to the questions we were asking was to listen. To listen to Him. To listen to those around us. To listen to our husbands. To listen to our children. To listen to our friends. Really listen. But to learn to distinguish between the voices. Those of the world and that still small one.

I was alone in our church auditorium for a little while yesterday morning. The only sound was the audio of the Bible being read continuously. The reading was from Deuteronomy, chapters 3 and 4. As I sat and listened to the words being read, I realized that over and over God was giving specific instructions. Go into this land. Don't go in to that land. Possess these people. Don't possess those people. On and on it goes as He instructs Moses about particular routes and enemies.

Hearing the inspired Word of God read out loud and in entire chapters and books is powerful. At first I just filtered the noise into the silence of the room. Not really listening to what was being read. Then the words began to come into focus. These few chapters are written in the first person. Moses is saying, "then God spoke to me". And the details of the journey are specific. There are direct instructions and specific tasks. God says do it this way.

Over and over again, the Word talked about taking on their enemies. And over and over again, the Lord assured them that He would give the enemies over to them if they obeyed His commands. At the end of Chapter 3, Moses is telling Joshua: "You have seen with your own eyes all that the Lord your God has done to these two kings. The Lord will do the same to all the kingdoms over there where you are going. Do not be afraid of them; the Lord your God himself will fight for you.".

What better words of wisdom could you bestow to others? To your children. To encourage your spouse. To minister to your friends. They were God's words spoken through Moses to Joshua. Sharing experience with knowledge to the next generation. Moses listened to God. Joshua listened to Moses. The people listened to them both. The children listened to the fathers. Moses was very clear with God's command to: "Teach them to your children and to their children after them."

If we aren't listening, how do we know what to teach? Where to go? What to do? How to love or to help or to serve? How do we share wisdom with our children and our families if we are not listening and learning? So that is what I am going to do this year... Listen.

God's Word is alive and active and able. He still speaks. We just need to learn to listen. Care to join me?

"Listen, O heavens, and I will speak!

Hear, O earth, the words that I say!

Let my teaching fall on you like rain;

let my speech settle like dew.

Let my words fall like rain on tender grass,

like gentle showers on young plants.

Deuteronomy 32:1-2 NLT

Immeasurably More...

The house is quiet this morning. The newlyweds packed up the dog and their stuff on Monday. They headed back to their home. The middle one headed off to Passion 2013 with her best friend from high school to spend 4 days of worship and the word. And the little one left early for school this morning to start a new semester.

I spent last night and this morning at our church for Watch Week. It is a time of 24/7 prayer. I met with some sweet ladies both times that are a part of my Bible Studies. Such a sweet time of prayer for and with my sisters in Christ. We laughed and we prayed and we shared stories. There is something so healing about a time of pure transparency before the Lord with our friends. Good for the soul.

I had an opportunity to pray for each of my children during this time too. There is a mission grid on one of the walls with the names of those serving here and abroad. As I was looking over the wall, I was caught off guard by my sweet daughter's new name! And I got to read the notes left for them there. And then I got to pray for my daughter and my son-in-law's ministry and marriage. It overwhelmed me.

Then I moved to a station where you prayed for someone and then lit a candle representing your prayer and the person. As I prayed for the middle one and all the other students who are hearing from God this week in downtown Atlanta, God reminded me of His hand on her life. I lit the candle and watched the flame. The flame flickered and blew to the side several times. I thought it was going to go out but then it just stood straight up and shined brightly against the darkness of the room. God whispered in my ear: "Nothing can extinguish the flame that I lit." My heart was blessed and overwhelmed.

This morning some of the sweet ladies that I was praying with not only attend my Bible Study but they are leaders in our student ministry. They prayed for the little one. They prayed for her heart. For her leadership. For protection. For her witness and her testimony. They covered her with a sweet aroma and lifted her to the Throne Room of Grace. Again. Overwhelmed.

One of the themes at Passion this week is that God can do immeasurably more than we can ask or even imagine. And He can. It is in His Word and it is a promise. And today I choose to let that promise seek in to my very being as a mother. He will do immeasurably more in their lives than I can even put words to or imagine in my own finite mind. Jesus loves them. This I know. For the Bible tells me so. And I am still overwhelmed...

Now to him who is able to do 

immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, 

according to his power that is at work within us... 

Ephesians 3:20

He Sees You...

I was dog sitting the week between Christmas and New Year's. I have an adorable "grand-dog" named Jolene. She is tiny and she followed me everywhere I went in the house. Just like a toddler, she demanded attention. I found myself looking at her constantly and saying "I see you!". She seemed to respond to the fact that I looked at her and acknowledged that she was there.

After she left, I started thinking about how often I said that phrase to her. I see you. Do I say that enough to my girls? To my husband? To my friends? Do I say to them: "I see that you are struggling" or "I see what a great job you did with that" or "I see your effort and your heart"?

We all have that human need to be acknowledged. That wife that needs her husband to really see her. That boy that needs his parents to acknowledge him. That teenage girl that needs her father to love her so that she doesn't beg for that attention from a boy. That mother that needs her children to appreciate her.

Jesus really saw people. He told Zacchaeus: "I see you! Come down and take me to your house.". He told the woman at the well: "I see you and your sins. But I love you and forgive you so go and sin no more." He told Peter: "I see your zeal and your passion but I know that you will deny me. Never the less, I will build my church on you.". He told the thief hanging on the cross next to him: "I see your heart and today I will see you in heaven".

El Roi. The Hebrew word for "the God who sees me". Jesus sees you... believe that today. Know that He sees you and your heart and your struggles and your pain. He sees you! And He knows. Rest in that today, sweet friends.

She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: 

“You are the God who sees me,” 

for she said, 

“I have now seen the One who sees me.” 

 Genesis 16:13