Greater is He...

Every where I look right now there is beauty. The gorgeous trees speckled with red, orange and yellow. The perfect colors of fall. The cool, crisp air and the beautiful sunshine. God's beauty is so evident in His creation. But, in the midst of all the beauty and wonder, there is a sense of heaviness and sadness and pain.

The heartache of sickness and death and brokenness seems to be everywhere right now too. Have you noticed how the beauty and bitterness can seem unbearably noticeable at the exact same time. For those in the middle of a struggle, the beauty sometimes pales in comparison to the fear and the pain.

But we have Hope. Greater is He that is in us than he that is in this world. We were never promised a pain free and problem free existence. But we were promised the One who will wipe away every tear. The One who will give us beauty for ashes. The One who will swallow up death and bring healing. The One who created the color and loves us beyond measure.

When I look around, I see my friend who just received the hard diagnosis. My friend who is desperately trying to salvage her marriage. My friend who is facing that surgery. My friend who is caring for her aging parents. My friend who is hurting so deeply for that prodigal son. My friend who is using every bit of her energy raising her precious children on her own. My friend who is caught in a cycle of addiction. My friend who is grieving the lose of her beloved. The view can be overwhelming.

But as I look up, I see my friend who is celebrating a new marriage that came on the heels of a season of pain. My friend who is living cancer free after a season of drugs and treatments. My friend who is praising God for a successful surgery. My friend who has seen God's provision in her parent's lives. My friend who celebrated the marriage of her prodigal daughter. My friend who emerged from her addiction and is celebrating a life of recovery. My friend who lost her precious daughter but is allowing God to use her grief to make a difference in other families lives.

In this world there is trouble. But we can have Peace. We can hold fast to the promises. They are yes and Amen. They give us hope and a future. Our Hope has overcome the world. The choice is ours. We can look down at our circumstances and become frustrated. We can look around at the hurt and become fearful. Or, we can look up at our Help and become hopeful.

My prayer for us this week is that we all choose to look up. To not believe the lies. To not listen to the negative voices. To not allow the fear to overtake us. We have Jesus. The name above all names. The name that when spoken will cause all knees to bow. The name that evokes freedom. The name that is a strong tower and a refuge. The name that washes away our guilt and shame. The name that cleanses us, forgives us and sends us forward in power.

Stand strong in that Name this week, my friends. He is greater than any fear you are facing. Greater than any loss that may come. Greater than any heartache you are experiencing. Greater than any pain you are going through. Greater than any lie you are believing. Greater than anything this world has to offer. Greater than any strength you have on your own.

Be blessed. Feel loved. Look up. He is there....

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, 

because the One who is in you is greater 

than the one who is in the world. 

1 John 4:4

Faithfulness on a Friday....

It has been a long week. Everyone around me seems to have had that kind of week too. Nothing earth shattering happened in my life this week; but still I feel a little overwhelmed. It has been one of those weeks that I just could not get it all done. I couldn't seem to complete the checklist. There always seemed to be something there was just not enough time to do. Someone that I did not have time to call. That commitment that kept getting pushed to the bottom of the list.

I feel like in my frustration that I did not do anything to the best of my ability. I feel like I snapped at  people in a few of my emails. That I was short with people when they texted me. That I did not listen enough to my husband and to my children. That I let some people down that could have used a little encouragement from me. I feel like no matter how hard I tried it just wasn't enough this week. 

This morning the Lord reminded me of His children in the dessert. The ones that knew that He was the One True God. The ones that He freed from captivity and gave the promise of new life in a land flowing with milk and honey. The ones that did not quiet get the obedience part and ended up walking in circles for a few years. Yet, in all of their shortcomings He provided them with manna. Every morning. Just enough for the day. No more. No less. The perfect amount for every person. Every family. Every day.

As the Israelites wandered through the dessert, God provided their food. There were a few rules. Nothing hard but the rules needed to be followed. The manna was to be gathered before sunrise. Early in the morning, His provision was available. The quantity collected made exactly one omer for every person. There was no need to worry about not having enough. His provision was perfect every time. On Friday morning, the amount gathered was enough for two days. His provision accounted for a day of rest. If the manna was not eaten on the day it was gathered, it would spoil. His provision was for that day.

Now don't you think that there were a few overachieving women in that group? A few single moms who thought if I just make enough for tomorrow too then I can sleep a few more hours. A few tired wives who thought that if they gathered a big basket full then their husbands might be impressed with how hard they worked and how well they provided for the family. A few daughters who thought that if they gathered an extra basket then mom would be grateful and maybe they would be the favorite for the day. If the internet had been available, I am sure that there would have been a few women who would blog about their gathering skills, photograph their innovative recipes and then figure out some clever way to make some manna creation Pinterest worthy!

But God is bigger than all of that. His provision is perfect. He went before them in a pillar of fire by night and in a cloud by day. His mercies and His tenderness and His Grace were new every morning. We don't have to work harder for it some days and we don't have to feel like we fell short in our gathering on others. He is faithful every day. With the perfect amount of everything we need.

Remember that today. Sit at His feet and gather your manna for the day. Then rest in the promise that it is just the right amount for today. He will sustain you. He will go before you. He will give you rest. And when you finish the day, even if you feel like you fell short, there will be more tomorrow. 

Be blessed today my friends. Great is His faithfulness!

Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, 

for His compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23

Reflections of perspective...

My middle daughter spent most of her childhood on a soccer field. She played the sport every fall and spring from the time she was four years old. Danny was her coach for a lot of those years. He started coaching her when the team was co-ed. When the shin guards were bigger than her little legs. When the highlight of the game was getting everyone to move towards the right goal. When the perspective of the game was simple. When we stood on the sidelines with the other parents and cheered on the team and all of the players and enjoyed the community of being together.


As she got older, the perspective of the game changed. The girls no longer played on teams with the boys. The cleats and the shin guards were a necessity. The highlight of the game was winning. By the time she got to high school we no longer stood on the sidelines. We all had chairs and blankets and coolers. We went on weekend game trips. We spent lots of time and money. The community part began to change. It was not always a nice atmosphere. More times than not, the parents did not act like the adults.


When you are living in the middle of a season with your child, it is hard to keep the right perspective. A lot of times we found ourselves caught up in the ridiculousness of competitive sports. There were times that we had to take a step back and regroup. We changed teams several times over the years. We bought countless pairs of cleats and uniforms and pictures. We loved watching her play and grow and learn. But there were lots of hard lessons through the years.


Team sports teach invaluable lessons to our children. I am all for a little competition and the life lessons that come with that. But as I look back at my perspective during those years, I have to be transparent and say that it was not always right. This morning during my quiet time I spent some time looking at my journal entries for October over the years. I noticed that there was a pattern to a lot of what I wrote. The height of soccer season and the emotions that were attached dominated a lot of space in my journal. As I read some of my thoughts throughout the years, I laughed at myself. Some of it seemed silly as I looked back with the perspective I have now. Of course, at the time the emotions and the feelings were very real.


Ansley did not play soccer her senior year. She decided it was time to hang up her cleats. She loved the game. She loved her teammates. She still is friends with a lot of them. But the lessons learned over all those years are shaping the young woman she is becoming. The tears. The joy. The heartache. The perspective. All of it is being worked together for her good. Only because she chooses to look at that part of her life from God's perspective. And He was faithful to show her how He works.


The summer before her senior year, she went to South Africa for a month. She lived there and shared in the lives of members of a local church in Durban. She helped with kids clubs and participated in church activities. She went into a remote village as part of a mission trip with the youth of the church. It just so happened that the Soccer World Cup was being held in South Africa during her time there. She saw the stadiums and the crowds from around the world that gathered for the love of the game. She saw a country embrace a game that brought healing. A country that was emerging from years of oppression and division. She experienced a group of people watch their country play a game she knew well. A game that she loved too. She had the opportunity to share Jesus through a game that had not only caused her some emotional pain but given her life lessons that she could share with others. 


She hasn't put on a pair of cleats for a while now, but she still loves the game. The little girl that started playing a game with passion is using what she learned to reach others. She also has a heart for missions. And as I look back at what God did throughout her young life, I see clearly what He is going to do in her future. The passion for a game. The passion for her God. The passion she has for life. It is all being worked together for good. 

And we know that God causes everything to work together 

for the good of those who love God 

and are called according to His purpose for them.

Romans 8:28 NLT

It matters...

Why does it matter so much to us what other people think of us? Is it just me?


A few months ago when I first started writing every morning, I received a message from a woman that I have never met. She goes to my church and wanted me to know how the story I wrote about my chair had impacted her. She wrote me a sweet note about how what I had to say spoke to her and a little about what she was going through personally. But there were two sentences in that note that have impacted me greatly the last few months.


The first sentence that caught my attention was this: "You don't know me but I have watched you over the years..." Wow. We don't stop often and remember that people are watching us. It doesn't matter who we are or what we do; there is always someone watching us. If you are a parent then your children are watching. If you are a student then other students and teachers are watching. If you are a in a work place then your co-workers are watching. If you are in any sort of public arena then lots of people are watching.


That one statement stopped me in my tracks. It was a humbling reminder that what I do and what I say matters. Even when I don't think anyone else is noticing. Last weekend the girls and I drove up to the North Georgia mountains. We made several stops and had a great day enjoying the weather and the beauty of a perfect fall day. As you can imagine, in a car full of females there were lots of conversations happening all at once. We were talking about wedding plans and listening to college stories and talking about birthday celebration plans all at the same time. Later in the weekend, one of my daughters made a statement about someone else. I did not like what she said and asked her why she thought that. She proceeded to inform me that what she said was what she heard me and another one of her sisters say!


Well, after a lengthy conversation to straighten out the misunderstanding, I was left wondering how she heard something so different than what I thought was said. It made me think about the note from a few months ago. The other sentence in that note that has made an impact on me was this: "I felt like the despair from my circumstances defined my relationship with God but it is good to see other people verbalize their feelings but not let it define their relationship."


As parents and friends, we need to live each day in such a way that what we believe is evident in what we say and do. And that is so hard to accomplish on a daily basis. Life is hard and we need to be able to express our frustration and our feelings about situations, but we need to be careful that those words do not mislead others. Especially our children. What they hear and receive now is shaping what they will believe as adults. We need to be mindful of our words. Even in our frustration and hurt, we need to choose wisely what we say about others.


I have more than a few friends that are in hard circumstances right now with their marriage or their children. Several of them have commented to me that they want to be so aware how they express their frustration with their spouse or with their child to their other children and the people around them. They do not want to make their children feel like that they have to defend mom or think bad about a family member just because the circumstances are making someone sad. There is such wisdom in that statement.


Hardship, hurt and pain last for a season. At some point, we will move on from those emotions. But the impact of the words and thoughts that we expressed while we were in those seasons will last a lifetime. As hard as it is, we need to be aware that there is always someone watching. It matters what they hear. It matters what they see. It matters how they receive.


But God's Grace and Mercy are so much bigger than our circumstances. In our weakness He is made strong. When we hurt, He knows. We do not have to tell everyone around us. We don't have to get our children or our friends on our side. We already have an Advocate that is interceding on our behalf.


So, today, unpack that baggage of despair and pain and hurt and anger. Place it at the foot of the Cross. Then leave it there. We all have those feelings. We want to feel validated by our hurt. We want to know that someone is on our side. Let Him show you how much He cares. It matters to Him how you feel. Give God those thoughts and words and feelings. Then, share the feeling of freedom that comes from allowing Him to carry our burdens. That is something worth sharing. Those feelings bring hope and thanksgiving. Someone is watching and listening. It will matter when they hear your Praise.

In the same way, let your light shine before others, 

so that they may see your good works 

and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. 

Matthew 5:16

Boasting in the Lord...

I got an email from one of the Christian bookstores saying that October is pastor appreciation month. They were advertising cards and gifts to send to your pastors to let them know how much you appreciate them. As I read some of the cards and the sayings on the gifts, I begin to think about my church and our staff. They are some pretty amazing people. Although there are quite a few of them on our staff, there are a few that have directly impacted our lives and the lives of our children. I do not think a card could express to them how much I appreciate who they are and what they do.

Our church is a church that believes in discipleship. We believe that relationship in community is where growth and understanding take place. We are led by an amazing man of God and his equally amazing wife. They serve by example and transparency. Not only does Buddy teach clearly and concisely the Word of God, but he lives it out. He has young men live in his home so that he can disciple them with life on life examples. Jody, his wife, lives out her faith the same way. When my oldest daughter got engaged, most of the people at church were thrilled and loved on her. But the first thing Jody did after she hugged her and looked at her ring was pray for her. Right there on the spot. A beautiful prayer of blessing and Hope for her future. That was a life on life example that Katie will carry into her new marriage and her life of ministry with her husband.

Our children are led by a Godly woman who lives her love for children in amazing ways too. She has surrounded herself with a team of talented and gifted people who believe that Jesus loves the little children and that children can express their faith through learning and worship. She has had curriculum written that reflects that idea and allows even our youngest children to learn the truth of God's Word and apply it to their young lives. She believes that children can express themselves in worship and can understand the gospel clearly. Denise and her husband Doug have five children that are a part of this community and are an example of how a family lives out discipleship.

Our students are led by a man who has served youth for years. He has taught our youth what discipleship is and exactly what it looks like. Our middle school program is called LUG, Living Under Grace. It is a program based on our high school students teaching our middle school students. The high school leaders are called LugHeads. They lead the small group time on Wednesday nights and do a great job. Randy and his wife Anita lead with integrity and by example. They have raised their children as they have poured into ours. Randy has a team of young men who pour into the students lives also. They are Godly examples of what men should look and act like. They too lead by example.

Our high school ministry is led by another man of God. Brian and his wife, Erin, also lead with spiritual depth and with love. They have adopted a beautiful little girl during the last year. During a long and eventful season of red tape, they lived transparently in front of the students. Brian not only teaches the Word of God clearly and with confidence every Sunday, but he has lived out his testimony openly and with integrity. Danny and I have had the privilege of serving under his leadership the last few years and we too, have been blessed by who he is.

We have been fortunate to be a part of a great church body. There are many more on staff that pour into our community of believers and into our neighborhoods and nations. When life seems hard and the world looks so dark, it is a comfort to belong to a group of believers that are led by strong leaders. I am thankful. I appreciate each of them. My children have been taught the gospel message clearly and have been challenged to live out their faith in the world. I am grateful for that. And I just couldn't find cards that conveyed all of those feelings.

So I encourage all of you to tell your pastors and church leaders what they mean to you. Write them a note or send them an email or pick up the phone and call them. Tell them how much you appreciate them. But more importantly pray for them. Pray for their ministry and for their families and for their spouses. Ask the Lord to bless them and protect them and give them strength.

Appreciate your pastoral leaders who gave you the Word of God. 

Take a good look at the way they live, 

and let their faithfulness instruct you, as well as their truthfulness. 

Hebrews 13:7 the message

Sweet moments of reflection...

On this day fifteen years ago, I was not feeling very well. My blood pressure had once again begun to climb to a dangerous level. My anxious thoughts about my pregnancy were rising. The doctors assured me that the baby was fine but the blood pressure issue was a slight concern. October 24th was my actual due date on the charts. It was the target date and after being on a few weeks of limited activity, I was ready to have this baby. We went to the doctor's office. Listened to the heartbeat. Took all the measurements. And finally, after the third blood pressure check we decided that it was time to induce labor. So, being the mom of two girls already and being in the middle of a busy fall season of activities and school, I decided to go home and make all the arrangements for everyone before going to the hospital.


We called all the grandparents and the aunts and uncles. We made a plan for the girls. We packed a bag and went by the office to wrap up a few details there. And then, we headed to the hospital. So different than the first pregnancy. We went to our room. They hooked me up to the evil pitocin drip and then we settled in to wait for our precious arrival.


Now, if any of you remember the events of fifteen years ago then you will clearly remember that the Braves were in the World Series. The Braves and the Yankees were tied in the series and downtown Atlanta was full of screaming Braves fans watching a very tense game. As I lay in my hospital bed hooked up to tubes and medicine and machines; the doctor and my husband were glued to the television. Yes, I got the privilege of having my doctor in my room almost the entire time in one of the largest labor and delivery hospitals in the Southeast. However, the attention was not always directed at me.


They were all so lucky that this was my third labor and that I was a laid back patient. I was actually not in much pain or discomfort until the last thirty minutes of the game. The funniest part about the whole evening was that my mother was also in the delivery room. She so wanted to be a part of one of my deliveries, so we had agreed to let her join us for the birth. She, as you can imagine, did not share in the Braves enthusiasm and by that point she had switched into full mother/grandmother mode. Let's just say that the Braves lost. The TV went off and my precious Maddie was born.


The memories of that day are still so fresh in my mind. We were blessed to have an enjoyable experience with each of the births of our children . Each time the waiting room was full of family and encouragement. Each time we were able to announce to everyone that the baby was healthy and beautiful. Each time we praised God for such a precious gift.


Life is a gift. Children are a privilege. Raising them is a responsibility not to be taken lightly. Parenting them is a life long endeavor. As all of my children are becoming more independent and older, I cannot help but reflect on those years when they seemed to need me more. It is easier to feel needed when they are young and physically need you to help them and guide them. It is much harder to feel appreciated and needed when they become independent. But, I think that is when they need us the most. To remember that our job is to mold and shape. To guide and direct. To point them to Jesus. To be the parents and the adults. Not to fall victim to the world's lies so that they can see what standing firm looks like. It gets harder the older our children get. But, hopefully, we get wiser.


As I reflect on the last fifteen years today, I can't help but smile. My baby girl is becoming an incredible young lady. She is growing and learning. She is entering into those years of driving and boys and hard lessons with friends. Her sisters have paved the way a little. And, of course, they think that she has it much easier than they did. According to them,  she is the baby and we treat her differently. But, the irony of that statement is that they see her differently too. It is so sweet to watch them protect her and fight for her. They give her the same advice I would. They just use different words. They want what is best for her and celebrate all the fun parts of high school with her. They truly love her well. It makes my heart smile.


Life changes and moves forward. We can't stop it. But we can hold tight to the memories. 


Happy Birthday my sweet Madelyn Lee. You are a joy and a blessing. We are so very proud of you and our prayer is that you continue to grow in your love and knowledge of Jesus. That you run hard after Him and that you love well those around you. Enjoy your special day, sweet girl. We celebrate you!

Frenzy Friday

God has a sense of humor. As I have been meditating on the word abide this week, my schedule has been packed and this week has actually been one of the busiest I have had in a while. Not only has my calendar been packed with extra stuff but the little stuff has been more than normal too. My oldest has been home all week which is wonderful but throws off the schedule a bit. My youngest is getting ready to celebrate a big birthday. My middle one has had lots of fun stuff going on at college this week and I have tried to have time to listen to the reports when they come. The weather changed quickly which always means that the girls inevitably will not be able to find that perfect sweat shirt or pair of boots that got put up when warm weather came. We had wedding plan meetings and made some big decisions. All the little things this week added up.


In the midst of my family stuff, this week brought about some really heavy prayer requests. My heart has been stretched trying to understand some of the sadness and brokenness and heartache. It is really hard sometimes, isn't it? To take into our human minds the hurts of this world. To try and make sense of the tragedy and the darkness. To celebrate the good as the bad seems so heightened around us. It just wears you out sometimes.


This morning, as I sat in my chair and realized how tired I was physically, it dawned on me that my soul was at rest. My heart was heavy but my soul was at peace. My flesh had been in a frenzy all week but somehow in the midst of it all I actually felt calm. I was just sitting there wrapped up my blanket looking out the window with no real thoughts. And that is when I realized that I was abiding.


All week long I had read scripture and stories and looked up quotes on abiding. My mind was set on things above. I had saturated myself in God's Word. Not for hours. In fact, a few days this week my quiet time lasted about 10 minutes. It was all the time I had. But in those few quiet minutes this week, I intentionally focused on God. On what it meant to abide. To be still. To know.


In His faithfulness, He revealed to me the answer. It has absolutely nothing to do with how hard I work. With how much I do. With all the people I help or pray with or talk to. It is not about my children or my husband. It is not about the good things I am doing or the heavy things that surround me. It is not about the voices trying to get my attention or the emotions that come from being hormonal. It doesn't matter if I am sick or if I have worked out 5 times this week. What matters is that my heart and my mind and my spirit were stayed on Him.


So as I begin another busy weekend full of celebration and family and friends and fun, I am at Peace. I have no idea what tomorrow will bring or how busy next week might be, but I know that this week God met me at my point of need. He was faithful to teach me and comfort me. Even though my body was in a frenzy at times and there were things pulling for my attention, my heart was kneeling. My mind was saturated with Truth. My spirit was agreeing with His. I was abiding.

Do not be anxious about anything, 

but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, 

present your requests to God. 

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding 

will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 

Philippians 4:6-7

A prayer of Blessing...

I love Fall. It is my very favorite season. I love the color. I love the weather. I love the holidays. I love the food and I love the smells. As the yellows and reds begin to peek out from the backdrop of green among the trees, I am always reminded of the beauty to come. The cooler air slowly creeps in. The festivals and fairs are advertised. The apple cider shows up on the shelves in the grocery store. It all just makes me smile.


But just like everything else in life, a new season requires change. This week I have been reminded how quickly life can change. Literally, overnight, we can wake up to a life that looks totally different. It can be overwhelming at times. We can get thrown off balance by the sudden shift in our lives.


Last night at my weekly Bible Study, we talked about how change is not always easy for us. All of my girls are in the very middle of their school semester. They all have had midterms and other tests the last few weeks. They are looking at their grades, adjusting their schedules and working hard to reach the desired goal for their classes. It brings about stress. Good or bad, the change causes them to readjust and shift. The stress placed on our students is overwhelming sometimes.


I have a friend who ended up in the emergency room with her husband. He had chest pains and just like that they were in a hospital running tests, placing stents and learning about medicines. Another friend is heartbroken over one of her children and the consequences imposed by his actions. Another friend is desperately trying to salvage a marriage that is crumbling around her. Another friend is bringing her husband home from an alcohol rehab center. Another friend is watching her beautiful daughter live out consequences that came from others but still must be walked through. And yet another friend is offering to adopt a child from a young teenage mother so that she will not choose abortion.


Life is difficult and hard. It threatens to engulf us in heartache and sadness sometimes. There are weeks when we feel like we are surrounded by death and sickness and darkness. But, we have Hope. Our Hope came to overcome the world. Their is always voices and choices that are competing for our attention. But we can choose which one to listen to. Just look up. Turn your eyes toward Jesus. He is our portion and our prize. He is our ever present help in times of trouble. He is our healer and our provider.


If life is rolling in around you like the wind blowing in the cold front this morning, then make the choice to bundle up with Truth today. Let God reach down and lift your chin towards Him. Allow Him to bless you. To keep you. To make His face to shine upon you. To be gracious to you. Let Him lift up His countenance upon you and give you Peace.


My prayer for you today is this: "May the Lord bless you with Peace. May He cover you with gladness. May He remind you that He goes before you and that He is your rear guard. May He surround you with favor and with strength. May His love be evident to you. May everywhere you look and turn today be a reminder that even though you feel unsteady you serve a God whose Kingdom is unshakeable. May you know that you are loved and cared for and appreciated and called by name. May you feel the overwhelming power of a God that will never leave you and never forsake you. May you remember that there is nothing that can separate you from His love."


Be blessed, my friends.

Consequences and Character

I woke up this morning to the rain spinning and swirling loudly down the gutter next to my bedroom window. It was the strangest sound. It almost roared as the wind and rain swirled together and poured downward towards the ground. It actually took me a minute to figure out what in the world the sound was. It was unfamiliar and it startled me out of a deep sleep.


As I thought about that this morning during my quiet time, the Lord used it to remind me of one of the hardest parts of being a parent. I think that watching our children live out the consequences of their own poor choices is towards the top of the not so fun part of parenting. We have a natural tendency to keep them from any sort of harm so we have to be very intentional when they need to learn from their mistakes. 


Sometimes those poor choices or bad decisions mix together and swirl out of control. I have friends who are watching their children suffer from choosing the wrong friends or trying to fix one mistake with another. I am watching one of my own daughters learn a big lesson about commitment and follow through. It is so hard to see them hurting or struggling through the tough part.


But God's plan is to carry out to completion the good work that He began in them and in us. If we jump in and fix it, then we are robbing our children of the blessing of learning character. I know so many parents who are so caught up in making their children happy that they have lost sight of the goal. We are raising the next generation. The ones who will run the corporations. The ones who will run this country. The ones who will be the teachers and the doctors and the parents of our grandchildren.


As hard as it is to see them suffer, we must allow the lessons to be learned. That is how character is formed. Not by the rules that were broken or the mistakes that were made but by the consequences that come because of their actions. No matter how big or small the consequences may be.


Last night, as we were dealing with a consequence in our own home, my husband had to remind me of this truth. The mom in me wanted so badly to justify the issue because it was causing me to feel uncomfortable. I felt like I was the one made to look bad as a result of my daughter's choices. It was simply a matter of her being motivated and following through with the expectations that were given to her by a coach. But to me, it felt like a character flaw that was my job to teach her. I felt like I had done something wrong because she did not meet the expectation. Somehow I was to blame for her character flaw.


Danny reminded me that character is something learned from experience not taught. Our actions and decisions as parents affect that experience. We can allow the consequences to be fully carried out or we can step in and stop them prematurely. It is one of the hardest parenting concepts to learn. But as we mess it up and try again, then we too are gaining character.


Thank goodness for His grace. It gives us the strength to keep going. The strength to love our children enough to allow the consequences. The strength to wait it out. The strength to be the parent and not the friend. The strength to realize that our children's actions do not always reflect a lack of our parenting skills. The strength to watch as the Lord molds and shapes them in His refining fire. The strength to remember that our Hope is in what we cannot see. The strength to gain the character we so desperately want to see in our own children.

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, 

because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 

perseverance, character; and character, hope.

Romans 5:3-4

The Woman who Abides

I saw the most wonderful post on Facebook yesterday. It shows the contrast between what we do when we choose to be super woman and what we do when we choose to be an abiding woman. Such true stuff. As I read over the list countless times yesterday, I was having a hard time getting past the first statement. Super woman does. Abiding woman is.


My favorite verse in the Bible is Psalm 46:10. Essentially it says that we are to be still and know. Pretty simple. The definition for abide is to wait for; to remain; to endure without yielding; to live or to dwell in a place. It sounds a lot like being still. But in order to abide in something not only must we be still, we must know that we can trust the place we have chosen to abide in.


As women we instinctively do. And as moms we feel like that if we don't do then it won't get done. God wired us that way. But we get caught up in ourselves sometimes as we go about doing. We think that we are the only ones that can do it right. That if it is broken then we are called to fix it. If our children or our husband aren't doing what we think they should be doing then they are wrong. Our perspective of working our way out of a situation or into the solution can spin us out of control.


When we begin to realize that remaining in Him is the only way we can truly be at peace, then we think and live and act out of a different place. We aren't as worried about pleasing others as we are about pleasing God. We don't work out of our own agenda because we are letting the Spirit be our guide. 


I received a text yesterday from a friend who said she was in the emergency room with her son. She thought it was his appendix but they were still running tests. She asked me to pray and I did. A few hours later she texted me back and said they were headed into surgery and could I please pray again. I immediately texted her and asked if she was okay and if she needed anything. She sent back this text. "We are good! At total peace because I know that he is in God's hands." She was abiding.


I have spent a lot of years doing. Trying to do the right thing. Trying to look the right way. Trying to be the best mom. Trying to be a good wife. Trying to make sure my children were happy. Trying to be a good friend. Trying to fix the situations around me. Trying to make sure that all the plates kept spinning. All it did was make me tired. 


But there is a better way. It is much easier. It will bring us much needed rest. And in the end, it will bring us the results we are looking for. We don't need to be a woman that does. We need to be a woman that is. That is on our knees for our children and our husbands. That is in His word looking for the answers. That is a friend who prays before we offer advice. That is someone who knows Who we belong to. That is a person that lives in the Peace that passes all understanding. That is a woman who can just be still and know.

"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you,

 you will ask what you desire, 

and it shall be done for you."

 John 15:7

A Moment in Time

My husband and I run on very different time schedules. I grew up thinking that arriving somewhere on time meant showing up 10 minutes early. He grew up thinking that arriving somewhere on time meant whenever you actually got there. We still see the time issue very differently. My girls think and act very differently on the time issue too. My oldest is extremely punctual. Always wanting to arrive early and absolutely hates to be late. My middle daughter is more toward the right on time thinking. No need to be early but don't want to be late either. My youngest daughter is of the laid back thought of her father. As long as you show up then all is well. It is so funny to watch all of us get ready to go somewhere all together. Let's just say that we have learned to compromise over the years. If not, someone may have gotten hurt.


Isn't it funny how even in the same family there is a difference of thinking? We each are wired differently and live our lives according to that bent. That is what makes families so fun. Learning to compromise and love each other through the differences. It always makes for great teaching moments for a mom. Especially when they were little and we were getting ready for a big event with three little girls. Danny learned quickly how to tie a bow, pick out the right shoes and even do a "bump" free ponytail. He is talented that way.


But God is not on a time schedule. Time as we know it does not hold true for the Sovereign Creator of the Universe. He isn't bound by a schedule or time restraint. All of our times are in His hands. He is never early or late.


We have been talking a lot at my church about Kairos moments. Those moments when you really feel like God has spoken to you or shown you something about your life. We all have had them. That moment in time when you get that "light bulb" illuminating thought. When you have an experience, good or bad, that causes you to stop, think and reflect. As a church, we have been using a circle diagram that is based on six directives. Observe, Reflect, Discuss, Plan, Account and Act. We have been using this model in our middle school ministry, high school ministry and our adult ministry. It is truly a life changing concept.


Each year for the last few years, I have chosen a word to represent the upcoming year for me personally and for my family. This years word is Abide. It has been amazing how the Lord has shown me that abiding in Him is the answer to all my questions. As I was praying about what to write this week, the word abide has been all around me. I read it this morning in my devotion and I saw something about it on Facebook. I think He is trying to tell me something. So as I am observing and reflecting today, I will try and discuss what I am hearing and learning over the next four days.


Abide with me this week. He will meet us in each moment of our day.

Exceeding Expectations

I was 24 years old when Katie was born. I had been married almost 3 years. My world changed drastically with that little bundle of joy. She was the first grandchild for both families. She obviously was a little spoiled and extremely loved. I remember that during the holidays of her first year the whole family would just sit around and watch her. Everything revolved around making her laugh and thinking she was the cutest thing ever. Of course, she was.


Danny and I were planners even back then. We had planned when we would have kids and planned for how we would allow me to stay home with them. We had it in writing. A little ledger chart that showed how much money we had in savings. We charted how much we needed to put away and how long it would take us to be at a place where we felt comfortable for me not to work. Our friends thought we were a little crazy. We even had a ten year plan.


All along the way of having babies and all the expenses that come along with that, Danny kept us on track. He diligently, yet gently, reminded me when things were not in the budget. We decided what we could live on and we lived on that. No more. Usually, because of me, no less. We were happy. Our girls were happy. We had everything we needed and a lot of what we wanted.


Because of his diligence and planning, I have been home raising my girls for 21 years now. It is my job. It is my passion. It is my privilege. I take it very seriously and I usually do most of it on my knees. I have had my moments when I let people discourage me about not working outside the home. I have been frustrated at times by the sacrifices we had to make to allow me to stay home. I have found myself over extended at times thinking I had more time to give to other things. But mostly I have been humbled by what God has done through the decisions we have made.


We have our own business. It is a family business that has been a part of Danny's family for over 40 years now. Because of his father's hard work and him following suit, we have been blessed. It was a mutual decision for me to not work. I go into the office twice a week and help where I can. Over the years I have learned enough about the business to be able to work when Danny goes on mission trips or hunting trips. We have learned to switch from the husband/wife role to the boss/employee role over time. I always tell people that I have been trying to get fired for over twenty years now.


I have wondered through the years if it has mattered that I have been home with my girls. I have second guessed myself at times. I have felt guilty at times because I was not helping out monetarily. But through the years, the Lord has shown me the benefits. This is what He called me to do. Danny has sacrificed more than me. He has worked long hours and given up some of his hobbies in order for us to be a strong family. He works hard every day but still finds the energy and time to be a good dad. It has not been easy and I am grateful. He never once has made me feel like I was taking something from him or that we were a burden to him. And I know that the world and the enemy have tried to convince him otherwise.


Last week as we were eating lunch at the office, we were talking about all of our planning and preparation for the future. He looked at me and said that he thought we had done pretty good with one income and that he was glad that we did it the way we did. He said that he knew that our girls were blessed because I was home with them and that they would bless his grandchildren because of it. I don't think he knows what those words meant to me.


Parenting is hard under the best of circumstances. But it is a calling. God wants us to trust Him and let Him lead us along the way. Not everyone makes the same choices. Sometimes our choices are made for us. Whatever that looks like for us, we cannot compare ourselves to others. Whether you are working full time or part time, whether you are staying at home or raising your kids on your own, whether you have saved for the future or have no idea how you will make it through next month; God is there. He knows your needs. He knows your heart. He will provide as you parent the next generation. You can expect Him to be faithful. You can trust Him to give you the tools you need and the energy it takes. Just ask. He will exceed your expectations. I promise.


And when He does. Tell your children. Share with them how God has worked in your family. Share with them how He provides for your needs and guides you along the way.  They will see that you trust Him. They will learn to trust Him too.  And they will then make a difference in the generation after them.

"so the next generation would know them, 

even the children yet to be born, 

and they in turn would tell their children." 

Psalm 78:6

The Path that leads to Peace

When Katie and I went to Rome this summer, our hotel was situated within walking distance of everything we needed. We would take the same route every morning to get to the bus station where the tour buses or the taxis or any other mode of transportation we needed was available. After a few days of walking the same way every morning, some of the people began to recognize us. We would pass the same bell hops in their bright red uniforms outside hotels and the same waiters in their crisp white coats setting up the outside cafe for the breakfast crowd. We would say hello and they would say "hey" or "hi" back with a huge smile on their face as they practiced their English. Even though we were in another country and everyone around us was speaking another language, that walk became familiar for us. It made us feel comfortable each day.

Several of the nights we were there, we would make our way to the Trevi fountain and eat at one the outside restaurants. The same thing happened there. As we would read the menus and look for a place to eat that night, the hostesses and the waiters would recognize us. They would smile and wave. Some would talk to us in broken English and laugh. But again, in an unfamiliar place, we felt comfortable and safe.

Life can be uncomfortable sometimes, can't it? We can feel out of our comfort zone so quickly. Our circumstances can become so overwhelming that we don't recognize anything familiar around us. There are even days when we feel like everyone around us is speaking a different language. Like the world around us didn't get the memo that our life was falling apart. No one seems to care that we are hurting or scared or lonely or just tired. Our circumstances begin to dictate our feelings.

When that happens, sometimes we just have to stop and be still. But we tend to run to anything or anyone that will listen to us. Sometimes that path is the one that is familiar to us. The path to that friend who will vent with us. That path to that place that makes us forget what we are feeling. Maybe even the path to that vice that numbs it all. 

But God says that His Word is a light to our path. Run to Him. The more we take that path, the more familiar it becomes. We begin to feel comfortable and safe. We begin to hear a language that we recognize. Our circumstances begin to pale in comparison to His Peace.

Try His path today. You will find it familiar and comfortable and safe.

"Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path."

Psalm 119:105

Counting my blessings...

I grew up in a small town south of Atlanta. My parents lived outside of town. It would be considered the country today. Lots of room between houses. Lots of open land to explore and roam around on. My brother and I had go-carts and motorcycles and ponies. We had a pool and a trampoline and lots of dogs and cats. We did not have central air when I was young; just an attic fan and screens on all the windows. We had a tire swing and a BB gun. We had a garden and lots of pecan trees. We had a tree house that my daddy built and a barn full of tractors and tools. It was a good place to grow up.


The name of our street was Campground Road named for the church campground at the end of the road. If you grew up in the south, then you know about camp meeting. One week out of the summer families gather at the camp ground to hear preaching and be with family and eat lots of good food. There are cabins with tin roofs and sawdust floors that have belonged to families for generations. There is an open air tabernacle with wooden pews in the center of the camp ground where preachers from the area churches come and share a sermon each night. There is a big cabin owned by the church for the youth groups to stay all week. I grew up going to camp meeting every year. It is a special place.


One of the best memories I have about camp meeting is the hymns we sang. The old hymns. The ones that you find yourself humming if you grew up singing them. One of my very favorites that we sang every year was about counting your blessings. "Count your blessings, name them one by one."


Life these days doesn't look like the simple perspective I had as a child. Things get a bit more complicated the older we get. Our perspective tends to change with our circumstances. We lose sight sometimes of all of our blessings. They aren't as easy to see through the demands of life. But they are there. We just have to stop and count them sometimes.


We don't stop often though, do we? Let's stop today and count our blessings. Name them one by one. Write them down. Tell them to our kids. Get them to write theirs down. When we do this, we can't help but see what God has done. In the middle of the worst of circumstances, there is always a blessing. We just have to look for it. Count it as a gift. Receive it. Cherish it.


And then... pass it on! Bless someone today out of your blessings. Tell someone what a blessing they are to you. Share what God has done for you with others. You may be the only blessing they can count today.

When upon life's billows you are tempest tossed,
When you are discouraged thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.


Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly,
And you will be singing as the days go by.


So, amid the conflicts, whether great or small,
Do not be discouraged, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey's end.


Count your blessings, name them one by one;
Count your blessings, see what God hath done;
Count your blessings, name them one by one;
Count your many blessings, see what God hath done.