If mama ain't happy...

I have journaled for a number of years now.  It is something I always wanted to do but never seemed to be able to actually accomplish on a daily basis. At the end of 2006, I made a choice to meet with God every morning. To write out my prayers and my thoughts. I wrote a covenant with God that I would not put pressure on myself or feel guilt if I once again failed to follow through. I found a journal devotion book that had a short story and a few scripture verses with lines along the side of the page to write your thoughts. I have been journaling ever since.


On mornings that I find a few extra moments to spend, I look back at the date of that day over the years. It is so enlightening, humbling and entertaining. Sometimes I have no idea what I was talking about or praying for, but other times I was more detailed and I can close my eyes and be back in that moment. God is so faithful to show me where I was and where He has brought me.


Yesterday I had one of those times when I was looking back. On that day in 2008, I wrote a prayer. I have no idea what I must have read that prompted it but this is what I wrote... "I pray that I can change the saying 'if mama ain't happy, then nobody is happy' to ' if mama is full of Joy then the whole family is full of Joy'".


As mothers, we hold more power in our homes than we probably realize. I have really been convicted of this over the years. For so long, I would parent and love out of my emotions. If I was happy or felt good then things went well. If I was tired or mad, then things did not. I could change the mood of the whole house with one word or one look. As I allowed myself to take a really hard look at this reality, I began to pray fervently that things would change.


Whether I am married or not, whether my husband is home every night or out of town all week, whether I have one child or six; the choice is mine each day. I can run out of my own strength or I can draw my strength from Him. It is never easy. Every day looks and feels different.


Everything usually comes down to perspective. I can view the world and my circumstances through my natural eyes or I can choose to look up and see things through faith. It is the end of the week and I am tired. But, today I choose to finish strong. Want to join me?


At the end of that same journal entry, I wrote this... "if I could start each day with the same perspective that I end each day with, then I might live the moments in between differently."


The Joy of the Lord is my strength. I hope my family can see that today.